This world is a beautiful place to be in when you know how to use the way you are to your advantage. Being shy (timid, introvert) is no different. It gives you many qualities that other types of personality wouldn’t give you.

I am a shy person and to be honest, I like it. I don’t see anything wrong with it, on the contrary, it gave me the foundation to be who I am now and helps me to become better for the future.

Today, allow me to reveal to you 3 common mistakes shy people tend to make that stops them to take advantage of being shy; and later, discover the benefits of being shy and a few ideas of how to use them to your advantage.

1. Trying to be somebody else.

The world needs you. You as you are. You as a shy person.

Why? Because you are a great asset for those around you. Would you tell your secrets to an extrovert? Probably not. Would you find modesty in an extrovert? Probably not. Would you search for calm and serenity alongside an extrovert? Probably not.

That is not to say that is something wrong with being an extrovert. Far, far from it; it means that all of us, each person part of the big collective that is the human race, serves a purpose, serves a different function. We are completing each other in such amazing and wonderful ways.

For example: if you are the confidant for an extrovert, in return this person probably is helping you to get introduced in the circles you want to be.

2. Judging yourself too harshly.

Shy people tend to be sensitive to details. Plus, they have the affinity to make statistics, to notice patterns and anticipate consequences. Therefore, if you are a shy person, you are prone to judge yourself too harshly because you are that person that misses nothing, no gestures, no comments, no actions and sometimes, not even simple thoughts.

However, judging yourself is not modifying your behavior in positive, and it is deterring you from being the great person you, actually are. You already are a reserved person, you already approach things and people with caution, there is no need for you to do even more. Is it?

Let me tell you this: people around you don’t see, don’t notice, don’t know, exactly what you know, see and notice.

No matter who we are or how we are, we are aware, only about what is in our mind. We often get self-absorbed, and what you might consider a big offense or mistake you’ve done, most probably goes unnoticed by others.

Free yourself from judgment and use that space and time to improve what you believe you might lack in.

3. Underestimating your value and overestimating the value of other people.

It is true that being shy can give you many benefits, yet you need to pay attention that, if you try too much to be someone else, and adding judgment toward self on top of that, can make you end up with low self-esteem. Being shy is not a problem, is not taking your power to be successful and fulfilled, but having low self-esteem can. Having low self-esteem is an issue that you need to address.

Yes, you want to keep your modesty. However, there is a difference between being modest and downplaying your value. Take credit for what you’re doing right and assume the responsibilities that are coming from your merits. Understand your value because only in this way you can use your potential, talents and knowledge to your advantage and for the benefit of others.

Now, let’s talk about the benefits that being shy can offer you.

The power of the observer.

Did you know that wisdom comes more from observation rather than knowledge or practice? And observation is one of the benefits of being shy.

If you are shy, you are a good observer. You notice, and you pay attention to many things that most people don’t. Therefore, you have the awareness and a better understanding of what is happening around you.

Excellent listening skills.

Being a good listener doesn’t come naturally to most people, yet you are a naturally born listener. That means that you already have a great foundation to build on your communication, influence and assertiveness skills. Plus, it comes easier to you to empathize and sympathize with others. Compassion is your middle name, and people are drawn to you for your calming effect. They are open and relaxed in your presence which means you get the chance to know them better and in time, you become a good character judge.

Taking the time to think before speaking.

Rarely happens to a shy person to have that monumental discourse that some other people regret even before finishing it because shy people think before speaking.

Most probably you are analyzing and evaluating the effects, the consequences, and effectiveness of what you are saying before letting the words out. Are you not?

Self-reliant and independent.

A shy person knows how to entertain her/himself and how to solve his/hers situations and problems. How? Using creative thinking and a lot of caution.

Shy people are forced, by their nature to think outside of the box, to find new ways of doing things and as a consequence, they are creative and flexible.

Carmen Jacob is the creator of several personal development programs, courses, and books, which focus on using what you already have to improve your life and the life of those around you.

Choose Not Lose

by Guest Author on August 19, 2016 · 0 comments

The Szen Zone MECH.indd

A Sixty-Word SZEN Story:

All of the movies and videos were organized by title and genre and all of the labels were facing out so he could easily search to find the film of the week. His collection was enormous and the Sunday evening film ritual was something that he cherished – movie, popcorn, and delight. He hit play and gasped. The VCR had died.

And more…

Sometimes things that we get pretty used to go away. The VCR, the rotary phone and lunch served in coach class plus friends that move, or relationships that fade are a few examples. And whenever something is taken off of the shelf we choose from, there is a moment of searching and sometimes panic. Replacing what was with something new sounds easy enough, but not always true. Seems that change can be difficult especially when what was working fine, at least in our view, is suddenly not an option.

How we face new choices often determines if the new choice will work at all. Option 1: If we're reluctant to have something new in our lives because it's different and we resist, there is a good chance that whatever it is won't work and thus we prove to ourselves that something new isn't necessarily better. Option 2: And just as true is that if we embrace what's new we'll learn quickly to appreciate the improvement. Both of these options however have nothing to do with the object of change, but rather with our own perspective.

As the keepers of our own disposition and point of view we have the capability to judge, evaluate, endorse, reject or accept whatever we choose. So even if options are removed and things like VCRs, free television, cassette tapes, or even relationships and special people in our lives go away, we still get to choose how we feel about it. That's where the power of the human spirit lies. Our feelings about anything or anyone start with us. We choose, even if we lose.

Szenippet: If we didn't choose where we are, who did?

Szen Zone: Reaching a State of Positive Change , by Gary Szenderski, is a compilation of heartwarming and inspirational short stories that celebrate the power in each of us to create positive change in our lives.

The general overarching theme of the book is change and all of the aspects of it – creating, surviving, and managing change with the goal to recognize the power we have to create positive change in our lives and be what we want to be.

Topics covered include productivity, letting go of the past, embracing the potential of the future, and learning to take chances.

If you are a fan of short inspirational stories like those in the Chicken Soup for the Soul series, then this is a book you would certainly enjoy. Wherever you may find yourself in life, you will discover an insight or example in this book to help you change course and take charge of your life.

Whereas ZEN is of the moment and what is, SZEN celebrates what could be.

Praise for Szen Zone:

"Commonly held together by the thread of positive change, each tale tells of the triumph of the human spirit over adversity… Because it's composed of so many short stories, there is really something for everyone within the pages of this inspiring book. If you're looking for a dash of hope and a sprinkling of encouragement to change for the better, then look no further than Szen Zone. It's one of those books that bears picking up again and again throughout the seasons of your life, whenever you need a solid pick-me-up." – Reviewed by Red City Review

"Szen Zone is filled with illuminating stories and anecdotes that can help point the reader to that promised state of positive change, presented in a manner that's neither didactic nor preachy. Rather, Szenderski employs an easy going and conversational style of communicating his message to his readers that made me feel as though he were there alongside me, sharing his own efforts and experiences in a spirit of frankness, honesty and sincerity… Szen Zone is a book to breeze through and be inspired by, and then to be read more slowly in no particular order of topic, concentrating rather on the concepts and thoughts which most appeal at the moment. It's an impressive self-help guide and it's highly recommended." – Reviewed by Readers' Favorite

About the Author:

Gary Szenderski is an author, speaker, teacher and branding specialist, internationally acclaimed as an expert on the subject. He specializes in helping people and organizations to navigate change, and frequently speaks and writes on the topic of emerging brands, personal branding and companies in transition. Gary is an award-winning writer, author of theBook of Szen and Szen Zone, often quoted marketing expert, and recipient of the Distinguished Instructor Award from the University of California in Irvine where he teaches branding. He resides in Southern California.

Readers can connect with him on Facebook, Twitter, and Goodreads.

Throwing a party or hosting an event – be it social or business – is a fun and interesting way to catch up with friends, socialise with guests, and celebrate important days of your life. But as it turns out, when you're the one doing all of the planning, the cooking, the serving and the clean-up, it's not so fun. Organising, planning, hosting, and overseeing that all of it goes as planned is a hectic job, leaving very little scope for you to enjoy your event. Here are some big reasons for you to consider hiring a catering service for your next event rather than doing it all on your own.

Cut out stress

The stress involved with organising an event is huge. From planning the menu, buying the ingredients, preparing the food, cooking, presenting, and serving the food, all the way to cleaning up after the guests leave – catering can leave you so exhausted that you may miss out on the main purpose of event, which is mingling with your guests. Hiring professionals not only takes the pressure off you but also those volunteering friends, family members or co-workers who can relax and have fun instead of helping you around and stressing themselves out while doing so.

Feed a crowd with confidence

Hosting a large group comes with its own share of challenges. First of all, you may not have the kitchen space, the equipment, the energy or the means to cook for a crowd. Secondly, menu selection can be a chore, what with special dietary needs or food allergies thrown into the equation. Plus, you could easily go wrong in estimating the amount of food needed to prepare for a large group, resulting in either running out or having too much food left over. A professional catering service, with the means and experiences of hosting such events, is your answer to all of these problems.

Have all the tiny details taken care of

Mint leaves to garnish the Mojitos, serving on warm plates, putting together a playlist to complete the whole entertaining experience – it's often these small things that come together to elevate an event from good to great but they can be easily forgotten in the rush. Professional caterers remember all these little details to make your event a truly memorable one.

Save money

It's a common mistake to think of a catered event as a costlier alternative to doing it on your own. And here's why. The cost of all the food, drinks, equipment and table décor for a single event can add up to a lot of expense. Professional caterers usually have most of the equipment and table decorations. Plus, they source their ingredients, foods, and drinks from wholesalers, at much lower prices than you'd spend at grocery stores. This is why they can offer their services at cost-effective rates.

Create the right impression

A professionally catered event goes a long way in making it creating the right impression on your guests. Having a good catering service can make a world of difference to the overall vibe of your event, while it also shows that you took time to really make the event special.

So whenever you're planning your next event, bring professionals into the scene. You'll experience the benefits first-hand. There are many professional party caterers Sydney has to offer to help you turn your event into a success.


Image courtesy of Personal Income