Disclaimer: That is not my tiny black underwear! (
unless that is fashionable?)
Today it is an honor to have Megan Bord, from It's All About Joy, here to share a fun story. Megan is a wonderful and caring friend, and someone whose words always touch upon a deeper spot in my heart. Ever since Megan and I crossed paths, I have just really sensed this deeper heart connection to love and joy. As I have talked more with her, I know this is much more than just a sense…it is truly a part of her core. Megan radiates life, love, and inner joy in very beautiful ways.
Read along, as Megan shares a recent personal experience, and how that all relates to each of our own unique quirks…
Acceptance And A Pair of Tiny Black Underwear
“As quirky as we are – and we’re all pretty quirky – you will find you don’t need anyone else’s approval for how you live your life. You aren’t dependent on anyone else’s opinion of your clothes, hair, weight, demeanor. In return, you are less judgmental of everyone else. Your capacity to simply accept everyone as they are grows.” Geri Larkin, The Chocolate Cake Sutra
As a recovering perfectionist (aka, an incredibly fearful person), when I first read the paragraph above, I loved it. As recently as a few years ago, though, had I read that same paragraph, I wouldn’t have understood it.
Let me set the stage a bit better: I’m the girl who used to put on lipstick and earrings to go for a run. I’m the one who, as a kid, took two hours to do her hair… for school. I think I singlehandedly supported the hairspray industry from 1985 – 2000. And for God’s sake, don’t touch my hair! (Sheesh) I’m the one who always carried a little mirror with her in the event that one suspected they hade something stuck in their teeth or nose, and I’m also the friend who would tell others if that was the case.
To say I was a fuss budget doesn’t quite do it justice, but it’s a start.
I cared what other people thought of me. I cared so much that at times I let it rule my thoughts and affect my actions. I wanted to feel safe and secure, and was convinced that validation came from the outside.
These days, I’m a bit wiser. I recognize that the only person’s opinion that truly matters – the one I need to be able to live with at the end of each day – is my own. And the older I get and the more I open my mind and heart to the world around me, the easier self-acceptance becomes. It’s such a beautiful two-way street, too. The less I judge myself, the less I judge others. And the more I view others with compassionate, loving eyes, the easier it is to view myself that way, too.
And that leads to stories like the one I encountered the other day, which, had it happened ten years ago, would have mortified me. Now, though, it just makes me laugh.
Here’s what happened: After spending three hours out and about, I returned home and decided to change into my most comfortable pajamas. As I took off my pants, I noticed that a pair of tiny black underwear had fallen to the floor. I thought, “That’s odd. I’m not wearing black underwear today.” After a few seconds of sizing up what might have happened, I realized that while I may not have thought I was wearing black underwear that day, static cling being what it is (God’s substitute for duct tape), there was a good chance those tiny panties had been wearing me! Lord only knows who saw them stuck to whatever part of my pants they decided to make as their home as I trounced here, there and everywhere. Gracious, can you even imagine?!
Ah, but our own quirks and imperfections are what make it easier for us to relate to the quirks and imperfections in others. And as I accept my flaws, black underwear and all, I find it infinitely easier to embrace yours. I don’t know about you, but to me that feels like such a beautiful, joyful and connective way to live!