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Coaches…Not Just For Football Players

group hug
Creative Commons License photo credit: 10 Nin­jas Steve

“All coach­ing is, is tak­ing a player where he can’t take him­self” ~ Bill McCartney

When we hear the word “coach”, the first thing most peo­ple think of is a sports coach.  We expect a sports team or player will have a coach.  We expect them to, if they will have any chance of suc­cess in their sport.  How can they com­pete if they don’t?  How can they stand a chance if there isn’t some­one pro­vid­ing direc­tion and strategy?

Foot­ball teams have them.  Soc­cer teams have them.  Run­ners have them.  Cheer­lead­ers have them.

Coaches.  In sports, they’re the peo­ple who lead their team through a game, and through a sea­son.  They don’t play the game.  Their job is to instruct and lead the play­ers, to employ strate­gies, so that the team or player can best play their respec­tive game.  And aim for their goal of suc­cess in their game.

So, a coach is some­one who helps oth­ers employ a strat­egy for success.

In sports, suc­cess is mea­sured by win­ning games.  In life, how is suc­cess mea­sured?  Suc­cess in life is a very indi­vid­ual thing.  What suc­cess means to me is not what suc­cess means to you.  And how do we usu­ally get there (to suc­cess) in our lives?  How do we know what strat­egy to employ in our lives, to get us where we desire to be?

Think about that for a minute.

In sports, we expect a coach to be involved in a win­ning sea­son.  In life, we typ­i­cally expect we can do it our­selves.  And maybe we can.  Just like a run­ner can train them­selves for a marathon.  The ques­tion becomes, though, are we really achiev­ing what is possible.

Life coach­ing.  Life coach­ing is help­ing indi­vid­u­als deter­mine their per­sonal goals, and employ­ing strate­gies toward achiev­ing them.  Like a sports coach, a life coach has the task to give you direc­tion, help you to make some of the tough real­iza­tions, and lead you toward your own per­sonal successes.

My Expe­ri­ence

I recently par­tic­i­pated in a five-day coach­ing ses­sion hosted by coach Tom Volkar, look­ing at Authen­tic Busi­ness Dis­cov­ery.  This was a group coach­ing ses­sion, con­ducted by tele­phone.  My expec­ta­tion was that I would lis­ten on the phone for an hour, get pumped up, then go out and use that new-found energy.  And…repeat for five days.  That was not it at all…

Like the coach on a sports team, a life coach asks you to put in the time and effort to make liv­ing your life mean­ing­ful.  Mean­ing­ful in the sense that you really need to get to know you, and deter­mine what suc­cess means on a per­sonal level.

“Cham­pi­ons aren’t made in the gyms. Cham­pi­ons are made from some­thing they have deep inside them — a desire, a dream, a vision.” ~ Muham­mad Ali

The process of this week con­sisted of a series of ques­tions forc­ing me to really think about “me”.  Not just on the sur­face, what I por­tray, but more deeply, what it is that I truly value in life.  At times I strug­gled with the answers, and then other times the answers came eas­ily and quickly.   And that was good.  In the strug­gles, I was forced to look deep and really delve into how this all tied in with my core val­ues.  When real­iza­tions came more quickly, I knew that these real­iza­tions were in align­ment with who I am.  In the end, I came out with a bet­ter under­stand­ing of myself and what direc­tions I want to go in.  And that was an empow­er­ing realization!

Dur­ing the week, many tech­niques were pre­sented, of which our task was to use these tech­niques to dig deeper into who we are.  Some worked, some didn’t.  Not every tech­nique is going to work for every­one — because we are all dif­fer­ent.  Tom did a great job of pre­sent­ing us with meth­ods to use in dis­cov­er­ing what “authen­tic” means to each of us indi­vid­u­ally.  That not all worked for every­one is ok.  It’s ok because we all learn dif­fer­ently.  Hav­ing the right tools is the key.

Er Pupone
Creative Commons License photo credit: Smeerch

Like the coach on a sports team — life coach­ing helps you to focus and strate­gize on get­ting to where you desire to be.  A life coach is an out­side source, not biased by your life expe­ri­ences, work­ing to lead you to the cham­pi­onship game in life.  What­ever that cham­pi­onship game entails for you, that’s a great place to strive for!

Your Turn

What are your thoughts on life coach­ing?  Have you ever used a coach to give your life direc­tion or clar­ity?  Have you ever coached some­one else?  Is the ben­e­fit worth the cost?  Share your thoughts in the com­ments below.

Lance writes sto­ries from his heart, aim­ing to inspire and moti­vate, as you align more fully with YOUR true peak. When he’s not here, you can find him hang­ing out with his fam­ily, rid­ing a bike, or just gen­er­ally act­ing goofy.   Sign up for the Thoughts from the Tree­house newslet­ter and get addi­tional inspi­ra­tion in your email inbox!
Lance Ekum
View all posts by Lance Ekum

Comments

  1. Davina says:

    Hi Lance. Life coach­ing is beyond words (although you did an excel­lent job here of shar­ing your expe­ri­ence!). Yes, yes and yes, to answer all your ques­tions! :-)

    Davinas last blog post..Thanks, It Means The World To Me

  2. Cath Lawson says:

    Lance — until I met Tom, Tim and Davina — I must con­fess that i really didn’t have a bloody clue what a life coach was. Then I started read­ing their stuff and it blew me away. And it also made me think­ing. Now I ques­tion myself more. And every time some­thing goes wrong, I ask myself “what’s good about this”. Tom has asked me that so many times that it has now become a habit.

    I’m glad you enjoyed the course. I’ve heard that it is awesome.

    Cath Law­sons last blog post..Be A Busi­ness Suc­cess Story, No Mat­ter What Your Age

  3. A life coach is an out­side source, not biased by your life expe­ri­ences, work­ing to lead you to the cham­pi­onship game in life.”

    This is a good point. An out­side source can often see things we do not allow our­selves to see.

    I have never had a life coach in the tra­di­tional sense. But, I do con­sider a few peo­ple to be my men­tors. These peo­ple, Most I’ve never met. But, I lis­ten to their words, and con­tem­plate their sen­ti­ments. In that way, they are like life coaches to me.

    I think hir­ing a life coach can be a very excel­lent idea. What­ever it takes to help you out is worth­while. We must look at our options, and choose accordingly.

    Bam­boo Forests last blog post..7 Paths to Exces­sive Wealth

  4. Marelisa says:

    Do you know that psy­chol­o­gists rou­tinely set up appoint­ments other psy­chol­o­gists? Also, lawyers aren’t sup­posed to rep­re­sent them­selves. When you’re close to a prob­lem, some­times it’s really hard to see a solu­tion because there’s so much emo­tion involved. I think a life coach can give you per­spec­tive that you would never have been able to give your­self just because they’re detached from your life. It sounds like you’re really com­mit­ted to tak­ing the next step in your life devel­op­ment Lance, good for you :-)

    Marelisas last blog post..Three Incred­i­bly Effec­tive Cre­ativ­ity Techniques

  5. Laurie says:

    I took the class with Lance. It was every­thing he said it was. I learned so much about myself. I have already begun my new busi­ness and Tom was able to dif­fer­en­ti­ate his class to meet my needs too. It was an out­stand­ing experience.

    It was also great hear­ing the oth­ers in the class talk about them­selves. By the end of the week, I felt really bonded to the group. I feel like I have a new set of friends!

  6. Hey Lance,

    Thanks for the well though our per­spec­tive on your expe­ri­ence and on coach­ing in gen­eral. Yes I use a coach and coach­ing has acted as great accel­er­a­tor in my life. It’s dif­fi­cult to see your own blind spots, darn near impos­si­ble in fact. A coach can help you see options that you just haven’t con­sid­ered yourself.

    I love your sports anal­ogy because it is the cham­pi­ons who hire coaches to raise their game. A com­mon mis­con­cep­tion prob­a­bly taken from ther­apy is that there needs to be some­thing wrong with you to work with a coach. Not so. I have one client who hires me every time he’s pro­moted just so he nails the tran­si­tion period.

    Marelisa — you bring up an excel­lent point. Most pro­fes­sion­als would be fools to only rep­re­sent them­selves because they don’t know what they don’t know.

    Lance thanks for the rugby photo I appre­ci­ate it! :)

    Tom Volkar / Delight­ful Works last blog post..Why Don’t We Use What We Already Know?

  7. Writer Dad says:

    I’ve had a lot of men­tors, and am always look­ing for those who know more than me to help lead me in the right direc­tion, but have never given seri­ous con­sid­er­a­tion to a life coach.

    Writer Dads last blog post..SEO, I Don’t Think So.

  8. I like Marelisa’s point. Some­times our only prob­lem is that we’re too close to our prob­lems. What some folks con­sider unnec­es­sary talk and/or help is really just per­spec­tive. And it’s price­less. Sounds like Tom had a lot of suc­cess with this!

    Sara at On Sim­plic­i­tys last blog post..Three Expe­ri­ences You’d Like to Have

  9. Jennifer says:

    Lance, thanks for shar­ing this expe­ri­ence with us. I had never heard of a life coach I don’t believe until I started blog­ging. I have never hired a life coach, but I have had some men­tors. I do love read­ing the blogs of life coaches though because they make me think. My favorite blogs are the ones that make me think and then actu­ally change.

    I can def­i­nitely see the ben­e­fit of hir­ing a life coach and would con­sider it myself to help me see the “blind spots” like Tom talked about.

    Teach­ing oth­ers what my men­tors have taught me has been a huge bless­ing in my life. I can’t say I would call it coach­ing, but it is life chang­ing mate­r­ial nonetheless.

    Jen­nifers last blog post..What Real­ity Have You Created?

  10. I think a life coach is great. They help you see your stuff from a dif­fer­ent per­spec­tive. I’m in the process of find­ing one that will fit my needs.

    It’s like dat­ing. You can’t set­tle on the first one.

    Karl — Work Happy Nows last blog post..Your 3 Careers — Are You Ready?

  11. I used to say that I would NEVER use a life coach. But after 7 months in the blo­gos­phere, I am slowly chang­ing my mind. I do think it depends a lot on the coach, and that great chem­istry between the coach and the per­son he coaches is very important.

  12. I could use / need a life coach right about now…but I have a thing with ‘tak­ing advice/orders’ from other peo­ple. Usu­ally when some­one sug­gests I do some­thing, I sud­denly have the desire to to The Exact Opposite.

    meleah rebec­c­ahs last blog post..Happy Birth­day … To Me

  13. Evelyn Lim says:

    I’m glad to read excel­lent reviews about Tom’s course. I am not sur­prised to. I believe that Tom is and will make a great one for anyone!

    Eve­lyn Lims last blog post..Heroes Of Heal­ing: Neale Don­ald Walsch

  14. Tammy Warren says:

    I was up late tonight and I had been work­ing on my post for the day. I guess we have some sort of ESP going on here. You men­tioned “val­ues” and that is what a touched on. I know I just did the ulti­mate NO NO in blogging…talking about mine over here. It was strange to see you had posted on some­thing I had just writ­ten about.

    Coach­ing. I know we have dis­cussed that I coach for the boys. I love the com­par­i­son you made between a coach and life coach. The con­cept is so new to me. I am sure it would be a great relief to be able to reach out and have a life coach. This is some­thing I need to think about.

    Thank you Lance…you are truly a kind hearted person.

    Tammy War­rens last blog post..My Atten­tive Heart…do you have one?

  15. Lance says:

    @Davina — Yes, there is much we can power in hav­ing out­side influ­ences assist us objec­tively — and pro­vide guid­ance and direc­tion we might not see our­selves. You’ve been there, and done that — that’s great! You know from expe­ri­ence in this area, thanks for sharing!

    @Cath — I didn’t really have a clue either! That’s one of the great things about coach­ing — it forces you to “think”. Think about you — at a deep level. In the nor­mal busy-ness of life, this was not some­thing I was doing. Coach­ing was a great way to be forced to “make” time for this — an impor­tant but neglected activity.

    @Bamboo For­est — Yes, an out­side source can look at us from a dif­fer­ent lens than we nor­mally look at our­selves. And in doing that, they can see things we might miss. The thing about a life coach is that they are focused on spe­cific objec­tives they are look­ing to accom­plish. And that focus can really pro­vide clarity!

    @Marelisa — That’s an excel­lent point Marelisa — being too close to the prob­lem, we can’t always get by the emo­tions and per­sonal issues — to see what the solu­tions are. How true! And great exam­ples! That really is one of the big ben­e­fits that can be derived from hav­ing a coach in your life — they come from a point of being out­side — and aren’t as attached to the emo­tions behind “you” (the col­lec­tive “you”).

    @Laurie — It was really great to have you in our ses­sions with Tom! You bring up a great point about Tom, that I hadn’t men­tioned — that is — he did a great job of cus­tomiz­ing our ses­sions to meet our needs — it wasn’t just a hard and set group of objec­tives that he had planned from the start of the week. He did an excel­lent job of adjust­ing his meth­ods based upon where our con­ver­sa­tions led us. And, in being in a group set­ting, there was a “bond­ing” that took place — pow­er­ful in it’s own right, and a real side ben­e­fit to just the coach­ing that took place. It’s great to have a new set of friends to bounce idea off of! You’re well on your way to many future suc­cesses Laurie!

    @Tom — Really, I should be thank­ing you — for a great week of learn­ing and grow­ing. And for chal­leng­ing me to really step out­side of myself and my com­fort zone. Being that we live in a house that revolves around one sport or another (I for­get who I have to take to what prac­tice tonight…) — it really was a fit­ting anal­ogy for me! That mis­con­cep­tion is true — I have had that thought — why do I need a coach? I only need one if there is some­thing wrong with me. And that’s a incor­rect thought. Coach­ing isn’t because there is some­thing wrong, it’s to take us to the next level. An impor­tant point to remem­ber, thanks for bring­ing it up Tom. And…I thought you’d appre­ci­ate the rugby pic­ture!! Thanks again for a great week!

    @Writer Dad — Men­tors can be a great source for us to bounce ideas off of, and they really can pro­vide direc­tion in our lives. The thing with coaches is that they are trained in this stuff — help­ing us to get bet­ter — and know what tools to use to get us there. Not say­ing a men­tor can’t do that (they can) — but a coach is a great resource because of their spe­cific area of focus. You may want to think about it!

    @Sara — I like Marelisa’s point also! Right on the money! Per­spec­tive — I like that way of look­ing at it. It is in our per­spec­tive, and how we look at it. If we see a coach as just being there to fix our prob­lems, then we’ll focus on just that — our prob­lems. If we see a coach as being there to really take us to the next level, then we look at the oppor­tu­ni­ties we have to get us there (strengths, weak­nesses that hold us back, val­ues, etc.).

    @Jennifer — The thing with a coach is that they are focused on just that — coach­ing. A men­tor is great to have, but the focus may be dif­fer­ent. Not in a bad way, just dif­fer­ent. I think men­tors and coaches com­ple­ment each other. I think you would find coach­ing to be a very pos­i­tive and enlight­en­ing expe­ri­ence. And Jen­nifer, that you’re able to share with oth­ers what you’ve learned from those you con­sid­ered men­tors — what a great gift to give away! Con­tinue to spread your goodness!

    @Karl — Good point, not every coach is going to be per­fect in every sit­u­a­tion. You have to be com­fort­able with the per­son you’ll be work­ing with.

    @Vered — This goes along very well with Karl’s point. Not every coach is going to work for every­body. Chem­istry between coach and “player” are key to suc­cess. Reminds me of some of the sports teams our kids have been on. Dif­fer­ent teach­ing styles by the dif­fer­ent coaches work dif­fer­ent ways for each child. Life coach­ing is no dif­fer­ent. It’s what we respond to that will make a difference.

    @Meleah — You’re a rebel Meleah!! I think of it not nec­es­sar­ily as tak­ing advice from some­one else, but as hav­ing them direct us toward a solu­tion. Part of it is a process of under­stand­ing our­selves. I didn’t feel that I was tak­ing orders, short of com­plet­ing the evenings assign­ments. And these became talk­ing points for dis­cus­sion. And not orders of what to do…

    @Evelyn — Yes, Tom did an excel­lent job of lead­ing our dis­cus­sion group, and really delv­ing into what was under­ly­ing. Pow­er­ful stuff!

    @Tammy — What’s the saying…oh yeah…great minds think alike!!! I’ll go with that! I too am more famil­iar with coach­ing in a sport envi­ron­ment (hence my ref­er­ences above). After doing this week expe­ri­ence, it was a per­fect com­par­i­son, and one that I too could relate too — com­ing from my expe­ri­ence in coach­ing sports. Give it some thought Tammy. For me, I hadn’t really given it much thought until I stum­bled upon it over at Tom’s site. I have tended to think of coach­ing in terms of kids or pro­fes­sional teams. And not for indi­vid­ual expe­ri­ences. But the thing is, just like a sports team want to win the big one — in our life we want to expe­ri­ence that which brings us the most joy and hap­pi­ness. A coach can really help to steer us in direc­tions toward that end — direc­tions we might not nor­mally see.

  16. Mark Salinas says:

    I think this hits home for me—->“Champions aren’t made in the gyms. Cham­pi­ons are made from some­thing they have deep inside them — a desire, a dream, a vision.” ~ Muham­mad Ali

    Wow! Thanks for shar­ing Lance.…always good!

  17. Although I have never offi­cially worked with a life coach, I am a huge fan. In the grand scheme of things, I want to be a life coach and help peo­ple “deter­mine their per­sonal goals, and employ strate­gies toward achiev­ing them”. The money fac­tor is the only thing that has blocked me from hir­ing a life coach and from sign­ing up for a life coach cer­ti­fi­ca­tion pro­gram. Both are expensive.

    Stacey / Cre­ate a Bal­ances last blog post..Join the Life Bal­ance Group Writ­ing Project

  18. Life coach­ing — well, I’ve used coaches both for busi­ness and per­sonal rea­sons and my hus­band is a coach, I’ve done a bit myself. A great coach, will, as you men­tioned ask you the “tough” ques­tions. A coach is not there to tell you what to do. They empower so you can make the dis­cov­ery. When I worked with a coach the first time I was tran­si­tion­ing out of cor­po­rate and into my own busi­ness — a very scary time filled with fear! She said two words to me that have stayed with me every since. The point is you might work with a coach for months, but the impact can hap­pen with just one or two words, ques­tions or key points. A coach will chal­lenge you and if you’re not open to the chal­lenge, the rela­tion­ship will not be successful.

    For me, a suc­cess­ful coach will anger me — which means they said some­thing or asked me a ques­tion that I’ve been avoid­ing and the anger is fear of bring­ing that sub­ject up. Deep down I know that’s the beast that needs to be released in order to move forward.

    My area is full of coaches and they often get a bad rap. That said a com­pe­tent coach can help you make life chang­ing discoveries.

    Stacey Ship­mans last blog post..Suc­cess Comes from The Heart

  19. BC Doan says:

    I’ve not used a life coach, but I believe they have a well of strate­gies and expe­ri­ences to help!

  20. Sev­eral times I con­sid­ered get­ting a life coach, but then I ended being able to dig deep and move for­ward on my own, every­time. It is some­thing I have always been able to do, and in more recent years have delib­er­ately devel­oped bet­ter skills to do. How­ever, I can def­i­nitely see how life coaches can be very ben­e­fi­cial. I find men­tors and men­tor­ing more ben­e­fi­cial for the type of per­son I am.

    Urban Pan­thers last blog post..Cre­ative collaboration

  21. Suzie says:

    My mother has been my coach most of my life. I hope Ill be that way for my kids too.

    Suzies last blog post..And It Still Goes On and On

  22. Pink Ink says:

    I’ve never had a life coach, but I sat beside one on a plane ride from L.A. and I was bowled over by the encour­age­ment he gave me just in an hour’s time. He asked me ques­tions about what I really want, and it was really scary but also exhil­a­rat­ing. Before we got off the plane, he looked me in the eye and said, “Go for your dreams”.

    It was a life-changing experience.

    I hope to sur­round myself with peo­ple who can give me a leg up when the going gets tough. That’s why I come back to your site :-)

    Have a great week­end, Lance!

    Pink Inks last blog post..Mail Call

  23. rummuser says:

    Lance, coach­ing is now being called as such. It has always been part of everyone’s life. We had our par­ents or grand par­ents coach­ing us, peo­ple who helped us in schools and col­leges, tutors, men­tors in work places, spir­i­tual guides etc. I have been sin­gu­larly lucky in that I have had all these types of coaches in my life, and never had to pay any one for the privilege.

    I cur­rently men­tor young entre­pre­neurs as an hon­orary men­tor, one among many such expe­ri­enced peo­ple, as part of our local cham­ber of com­merce and indus­try ini­tia­tive. This is a most sat­is­fy­ing activ­ity that I indulge in and to see young entre­pre­neurs suc­ceed is truly an expe­ri­ence that I wish all peo­ple with sim­i­lar back­grounds to mine can have. That is not all. It has been a learn­ing expe­ri­ence for me as well as I have been able to learn new soci­o­log­i­cal devel­op­ments about which I did not have a clue, pro­tected as I was in cor­po­rate security.

    rum­musers last blog post..I Am Truly Blessed.

  24. Linda Abbit says:

    Thanks for shar­ing your expe­ri­ence with us, Lance. A life coach has recently appeared in my life, and after read­ing this post and all the com­ments, I am more inter­ested in work­ing with her.

    I’d heard of life coaches before, but never totally under­stood how I could ben­e­fit from their ser­vices. Thanks for enlight­en­ing me.

    Linda Abbits last blog post..Inspir­ing Quotes for Care­givers — 10÷08÷08

  25. Maya says:

    Such great per­spec­tives here! Could not agree with Mare more.

    I have never used a coach but I do believe that coaches can be very good for us. They give our lives a dif­fer­ent per­spec­tive and help us be con­struc­tive. I can cer­tainly use that every so often!

    I want to be a coach myself. I have done a lot of infor­mal career coach­ing and I am try­ing to fig­ure out when would be a good time for my start. Thanks Lance, for the anal­ogy. It is very effec­tive to think of coach­ing that way!

    Mayas last blog post..The key to hap­pi­ness and bal­ance is right with you, just learn to use it — Part 2 of the thinkmaya framework

  26. Sagan says:

    I think life coach­ing is really great. And if you your­self do the life coach­ing for some­one else, you’re essen­tially learn­ing lots too!

    It doesn’t need to be some­one with a cer­ti­fi­ca­tion, either. Any­one can do life coach­ing. It’s ben­e­fi­cial to us all.

    Sagans last blog post..Life Lessons: Fash­ion Choices for Exercising

  27. Lance says:

    @Mark — I thought that quote really said much too. It’s all about your desires, your dreams, and your visions. If you are not in align­ment with those, it doesn’t really mat­ter what “gym” you’re in…

    @Stacey/Create A Bal­ance — Your bring up a very good point — the costs asso­ci­ated with this. It can seem like a catch-22 some­times — “I can’t afford to do it, but yet I can’t afford not too…”. And, if you do go ahead, are you “ready” for the changes that this might lead to. Many fac­tors to con­sider. It’s your time and money you’re putting into some­thing like this — it needs to be more than a “feel good” moment to make it worth it. The idea of the cost is what has held me back in the past too. In the end, you have to look at what the poten­tial pay-back is. Lots to think about…

    @Stacey Ship­man — You’re a coach­ing fam­ily!! It’s the tough ques­tions, the ones that make you “dig deep” — that are what really pro­vide the “bang for the buck” with coach­ing. I find it inter­est­ing that you use the word “anger”. It’s inter­est­ing in that typ­i­cally that an emo­tion asso­ci­ated with not get­ting along with some­one. But look­ing at it as the anger being the bring­ing up of some “fear” we have — that is it. That’s where the dig­ging deep by a coach really pays off. It gets you to face those hur­dles (another sports ref­er­ence) in your life. Thanks for shar­ing that unique look at how emo­tions play into the whole coach­ing arena. It makes much sense when we really think about it — what angers us is that which we have deep, some­times buried fears of…

    @BC Doan — Yes, they sure do!

    @Urban Pan­ther — Good point, some­times we are able to objec­tively see our­selves through some of those moments that require us to dig deep. I think one of the big dif­fer­ences I see between coaches and men­tors is that men­tors may know us bet­ter on a per­sonal level. In the end, it really comes down to what you are com­fort­able with. Sounds like found some­thing that is work­ing well for you!

    @Suzie — Parents/siblings/friends all have the abil­ity to help us through­out our lives. They are a great resource, as they know us well. Good point, thanks for the reminder that we are sur­rounded by infor­mal men­tors and coaches. Some­times that’s enough, other times a hired coach can com­ple­ment these infor­mal ones quite nicely.

    @Pink Ink — That story is a pow­er­ful tes­ti­mony to what coach­ing can do — thanks for shar­ing it here! That really is one of the real ben­e­fits of hav­ing a trained coach in your cor­ner. They’re trained in what to look for and what to ask — how to get you to look deep within your­self. I’m glad you’re here, it’s the great con­ver­sa­tions that get going that add real value — and you’re a big part of that!

    @Rummuser — As Suzie men­tioned some­thing very sim­i­lar, thanks for bring­ing this up — that we are sur­rounded by men­tors who can help us. And we should be open to what they have to tell us, and also return the favor by help­ing oth­ers as well. Being able to help young entre­pre­neurs — I can only imag­ine how per­son­ally grat­i­fy­ing that must be — I wish you well as you con­tinue on this endeavor!

    @Linda — I’m glad this was help­ful Linda! If you are ready for it, a life coach can be a very enlight­en­ing expe­ri­ence. What­ever deci­sion you make, I know you will do well!

    @Maya — I think we can all use the dif­fer­ent per­spec­tive occa­sion­ally. That’s a great point, that a coach can pro­vide a dif­fer­ent per­spec­tive into our lives than we see because of the sub­jec­tiv­ity with which we exam­ine our own lives. Good luck to you in pur­su­ing your dreams to become a coach — I’m cheer­ing you on!

    @Sagan — Another great point — both coach and stu­dent learn through coach­ing ses­sions. It’s not nec­es­sar­ily a one-way street. There is some­thing to be said for cer­ti­fi­ca­tions, but on the other hand, some­one with a real desire to coach, who is good at under­stand­ing other peo­ple, can do much good for oth­ers too — with­out the piece of paper cer­ti­fy­ing them.

  28. I’ve always done a lot of self-learning, and I’ve been inter­ested in per­sonal devel­op­ment since I was 16 and cured myself of a den­tal pho­bia using self-hypnosis. There are a lot of books out there with exer­cises to help us learn about our­selves. That said, I’ve also gone to many work­shops to get in touch with peo­ple with sim­i­lar inter­ests. It’s fun to have com­pany, too.

    Jean Browman–Cheerful Monks last blog post..Cre­at­ing a Sacred Space

  29. No, I have never used a coach. I prob­a­bly need one though…it sure couldn’t hurt to try. I have won­dered why you get a coach (trainer) at the gym or why I played soft­ball this sum­mer and that team had a coach but the most impor­tant thing, my life, didn’t have a coach.

  30. Lance says:

    @Jean — We can gain much through self-learning. Some­times we reach a point where we’re not mak­ing the progress we’d like, or we’ve come to a stand­still. This is a good time to visit the idea of a coach or men­tor. Work­shops also do this, although I’m not sure that you get as much indi­vid­u­al­ized atten­tion as with a coach. It comes down, again, to what works for you. It sounds like self-learning has worked well for you Jean, and that’s great!

    @Dave — I found my expe­ri­ence to be very enlight­en­ing Dave. I love your anal­ogy about how we’ll use a coach in other facets of our life, but not when it comes to the most impor­tant thing — our actual life. That’s a great point to ponder…

  31. Katie says:

    Inter­est­ing thoughts…I think that I had the same opin­ion of a life coach that you did in the beginning..I have been inter­ested in find­ing out some expe­ri­ences with one, so Thanks for shar­ing yours!

    Katies last blog post..Noth­ing But Every­thing is New….

  32. MizFit says:

    once upon a time…in a town like where she lives now…MizFit had a dif­fer­ent career and was a full time life coach!
    she loved it.

    once upon a time…in a town like where she lives now…MizFit had HER OWN life coach.

    now youve made me won­der why I ever let that lapse.… (the being coached :) I know why I ceased coaching)

    Miz­Fits last blog post..Poetry in Motion.

  33. I used to think about becom­ing a life coach myself, but a nig­gling voice inside my head thought it was just another excuse for me not to focus on my writ­ing. I have had a lim­ited amount of coach­ing done in con­junc­tion with holis­tic heal­ing and ther­apy, but that was a while ago. Lately, I’ve been think­ing I might need a life coach to help me sort out my writ­ing pri­or­i­ties and career con­fu­sion. It sounds like you got a lot out of your week with Tom, so will we be hear­ing about a new busi­ness soon Lance?

    Kelly

  34. bobbi says:

    Wow Lance what a great blog. I think for me my life coach has been my Dad, he has inspired me to be the best that I can be through all that I do in life. Neve pres­sur­ing me to be some­one I am not but to be the women God cre­ated me to be. And now as I am older and I am no longer my Dad­dys lit­tle girl, well I guess I will always be:) But I think my life coach is not just one per­son but all the peo­ple that I choose to be around, my friends, family,hubby and pas­tors. They cheer me on and push me through life, chal­lang­ing me, mold­ing me, and quite frankly mak­ing me sweat! lol

    bob­bis last blog post..Why Hemp? Free Giveaway!

  35. Lance says:

    @Katie — Glad you enjoyed the arti­cle. It really was an inter­est­ing process to go through in that not only did I learn about myself, but I also gained a good feel for what a life coach really is.

    @MizFit — That is cool! That you were a life coach! And had one. So you know the value they can bring!

    @Kelly — A life coach would be a great way to help you focus on your writ­ing. It might be worth con­sid­er­ing, even if it’s a cou­ple of ses­sions — to pro­vide some clar­ity and added direc­tion. Where this is tak­ing me…hmmm.…I’m not com­pletely sure yet. I really used the time to focus on why I write, and what it pro­vides for me.

    @Bobbi — Thanks! Yes, as oth­ers have said as well — many have infor­mal life coaches around them. And you do to — that’s great! We can learn much from those who are reg­u­lar par­tic­i­pants in our lives. The peo­ple we choose to be around — what a nice way of look­ing at this! We ARE influ­enced by those we asso­ciate with — so, being around peo­ple that are uplift­ing — are the ones that really DO lift us up. Thanks for the reminder on this. And I bet they really do make you sweat (literally!).

  36. Robin Easton says:

    Life coach­ing is incred­i­ble. My sis­ter is a life-coach. I’ve never been to one and I am not a trained one, but if I were not a writer and my sched­ule so full I would take it up and still may at some point.

    With that said I have coached and been coached by remark­able friends. And have wit­nessed the amaz­ing life changes that take place as a result of it. I think it is so essen­tial, in fact, we should have it all through high school, that early so that we can coach our­selves more con­sciously and direct our live at a much younger age. I think it would make a huge dif­fer­ence in young people’s live and hence the whole culture.

    Although some schools have coun­selors and guid­ance counselors…that’s not the same as a Life Coach. Find­ing, focus­ing on and liv­ing ones dreams…and a life direc­tion is powerful.

    Thanks for such an inspir­ing post…very well writ­ten. :)

    Robin Eas­t­ons last blog post..No Excep­tions

  37. Lance says:

    Robin, thanks for shar­ing your story here! Friends can be great coaches for us as well, if we’re open to receiv­ing what they have to say. Hav­ing this type of offer­ing in school could really help the kids com­ing out of high school really deter­mine the path of life that really speaks to them. I know for me com­ing out of high school, I had ideas, but noth­ing really con­crete to base my assump­tions on. It would be very helpful!

  38. RooBabs says:

    Most days, I think I would love to have a life coach. Then again, usu­ally my hus­band and fam­ily fill that role pretty well.

    At my office, the super­vi­sors are called Team Man­agers and their weekly meet­ings are called Coach­ing Ses­sions. I think it defnitely gives a dif­fer­ent per­spec­tive for what the pur­pose is of hav­ing the meet­ings in the first place. It’s not just about the stats, it’s about improv­ing and moti­vat­ing and being a sup­port for someone.

    Thanks for this great post!

    RooB­a­bss last blog post..Does This Pic­ture Make Me Look Cold? Ran­dom Photo of the Week

  39. Lance says:

    RooB­abs — Right on, we do usu­ally have peo­ple in our lives that can ful­fill this role (at least to an extent). I like how you’ve described your meet­ings at work — a great exam­ple — the idea of “coach­ing” does usu­ally bring up moti­va­tion — and that’s a great way to look at weekly meet­ings — whether at work or in your per­sonal life — thanks for shar­ing that idea!

  40. Jenny says:

    I believe I need a life coach. There are so many things I know I could do bet­ter, espe­cially in the goals and what direc­tion I am going areas. I think I could achieve my goals, if I just knew what they were!

    Jen­nys last blog post..Moments

  41. Zandria says:

    I’ve never had a for­mal life coach, but I cer­tainly think it would be nice. Friends can be great for such pur­poses some­times, but often they’re too closely involved (mean­ing they won’t tell you the entire truth because they’re wor­ried about hurt­ing your feelings).

    Zan­drias last blog post..Week­end Recap (Wed­ding Fun!)

  42. Liara Covert says:

    Even if you are not an ath­lete, you can relate to the desire for encour­age­ment and men­tal dis­ci­pline to accom­plish your own life goals. Every life stage offers chal­lenges. Some peo­ple view life as a game to be mas­tered. Ulti­mately, you live in the body you have right now to love and learn to mas­ter your­self. Its your job.

    Liara Coverts last blog post..More peo­ple relate than you think

  43. That was enlight­en­ing, thank you. We all could use a life coach.

    I have always looked to books as my life coaches & teach­ers in life, read­ing the works of great writers/achievers and about their lives. I real­ized some­thing — some­times I find great dif­fi­culty to exer­cise my knowl­edge to straighten out my life’s issues.

    Emo­tions can get in the way of clar­ity. To think that friends turn to me for my “wis­dom” when they have their prob­lems. Yet I can’t solve my own.

    so thanks, today I learn some­thing new

  44. Lance says:

    @Jenny — A life coach can be just the thing to get you kick-started in the direc­tions you desire to go — I say go for it Jenny!

    @Zandria — That’s a great point — being too closely involved — and a great rea­son for con­sid­er­ing a for­mal life coach — some­one with­out the emo­tional ties to “you”.

    @Liara — Every life cer­tainly does have stages and new chal­lenges that go along with them. A life coach can be a great resource for get­ting you through all of these areas…

    @Noraini — Emo­tions — a very excel­lent point — they can really get in the way of clar­ity. And that’s some­thing a life coach really can pro­vide, a non-emotional look at “you” — and help you get a clear assess­ment of where you’re at, where you want to go, and how to get there…

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