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Do We Really Need to Buy Each Other More Stuff?

Maybe there’s another way…

Note:  If you’re expe­ri­enc­ing issues view­ing this, click here.

Jayson Gad­dis, MA, LPC, CGT is a rela­tion­ship psy­chother­a­pist devoted to help­ing peo­ple awaken through rela­tion­ship and inti­macy. He’s call­ing in a new par­a­digm of con­nec­tion, deep rela­tion­ship, and fam­ily. Jayson is a hus­band and part-time stay-at-home Dad get­ting schooled by his two kids.
Jayson Gaddis
View all posts by Jayson Gad­dis

Comments

  1. Hey Jayson,
    I like to give “thought­less” gift cards to my friends that have chil­dren. This way they can pick out what their kids want and need. As far as adults go, I give them gift cards to their favorite restaurants.

    I agree that we don’t need more mate­r­ial crap in our lives.
    Justin | Per­sonal Growth´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Why You Chose to be on Earth at This TimeMy Profile

  2. Jean Burman says:

    Hi Jayson

    I really liked your video! It’s so cool to see a person’s face and hear what they have to say… and video gets this mes­sage across even bet­ter than the writ­ten word [espe­cially when it’s done well] So thank you for that :-)

    Your mes­sage of giv­ing love instead of crap is a good one. But stuff doesn’t always have to be crap. I value the things peo­ple give me… espe­cially the things my kids made for me when they were lit­tle… and have long since for­got­ten about. But I haven’t for­got­ten and the mem­ory of their child­hood lives on in those lit­tle things they gave. And my mom as well now she’s no longer here. The giv­ing of heart­felt gifts meant the world to me then… and still does. It’s just the heart­felt thing that can’t be miss­ing in the giv­ing of stuff [grin] Could be just me tho ;-/

    Thanks again for rais­ing the issue in such a thought­ful way.
    Jean Burman´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Back­yard Pol­i­tics [why Obama is here in Aus­tralia — really]My Profile

  3. Evita says:

    Jayson this is an out­stand­ing mes­sage that I per­son­ally res­onate with and sec­ond whole­heart­edly. Con­sumerism, buy­ing and ful­fill­ing expec­ta­tions and oblig­a­tions (illu­sory ones at that) is so not appeal­ing to more and more of us as we live more awak­ened, mean­ing­ful and authen­tic lives.
    Evita´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..New Earth Liv­ing: Stay­ing Open to Infi­nite PossibilitiesMy Profile

  4. Jacqueline says:

    Thanks Lance and Jayson for shar­ing this mes­sage. We all have so much “stuff” in our lives we really don’t need and as a new Mother of my 2nd child I see how easy it is for our chil­dren to get stuck in the world of “more” and not ever enough. My son was wast­ing some­thing as sim­ple as food yes­ter­day (he wanted to play a mix­ing age with it rather than eat­ing it) at the age of 4 and I needed to express to him that there were so many chil­dren that didn’t even have food let alone all the ben­e­fits he has in his life. He looked at me and ask if there were really chil­dren that went with­out sup­per every day and I was very clear that there were thou­sands every­day that sgo hun­gry. Whether he under­stood it or not it is the begin­ning of my les­son to him that we don’t need to waste any­thing in our world and that what we have is not the norm for most peo­ple. I only buy my son 2nd hand toys and we shop together at these stores so he under­stands the value of reusing and money. We make cards from his art as gifts rather than buy­ing more stuff for our fam­ily and over the hol­i­days we make a dona­tion in hon­our of our fam­ily rather then spend­ing the money on more stuff no one needs. I encour­age every­one to rethink the hol­i­day sea­son as a time of giv­ing to those that have noth­ing rather than giv­ing more to those that have it all. Thank you again for shar­ing such an impor­tant mes­sage that every­one needs to con­sider.
    Jacqueline´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..8 Ways to Shop and Give This Hol­i­day SeasonMy Profile

    • Jayson says:

      Jacque­line,

      Awe­some. I will do the same for my kids. I do have to be care­ful how­ever, of not per­pet­u­at­ing the notion of “scarcity” which could be a coun­ter­ar­gu­ment here. I buy at thrift stores and trade goods and toys, not because we live in fear and are watch­ing our bud­get (although that is in there), but because I’m teach­ing them we don’t need “more” and “new.” in order to enjoy life.
      Jayson´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Why Most Men Resist Cou­ples CounselingMy Profile

  5. Howie says:

    Hi Jayson great video — with Black Fri­day try­ing to sell, sell .… it is about time to take a more real­is­tic approach. Are we blinded by price?

    I agree I shall be send­ing cards to my real friends and fam­ily.
    Howie´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Stay­ing Debt Free: Avoid a RelapseMy Profile

  6. Hey Jayson,

    My favorite Christ­mas to date was a year we didn’t buy gifts. Instead every­one who wanted pitched in some cash and we rented a huge cabin in some local moun­tains and played int he snow and ate good food and spent lots of qual­ity time with friends and family.

    My sec­ond favorite Christ­mas was a year we didn’t buy gifts again (except for the young kids in the fam­ily). Instead, we made Christ­mas Tree orna­ments for each other. We got to get cre­ative and kept it mean­ing­ful as well. We still have and use those orna­ments to this day. One of them was made with ped­als from my grandmother’s funeral. Talk­ing about meaning!

    Still, I do think it’s impor­tant to be sure our “gift” to oth­ers is not only mean­ing­ful to us, but is mean­ing­ful to those we’re giv­ing it to as well.

    Thanks for the great mes­sage, Jayson!
    KenWert@MeanttobeHappy´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..48 Uncon­ven­tional Things I’m Grate­ful for … that I bet are not on your list!My Profile

  7. John Sherry says:

    Great ques­tion and ethic Jayson, you’ve lit up my day! Boy does this con­sumer dri­ven world some­times give me despair these days — can’t peo­ple see that the whole money rush to have more and buy more has led us into the very finan­cial precipice we’re now hov­er­ing on? What does a new cell phone or TV do for your life that love, good health, and men­tal peace does not? Last Xmas me and my friends did a no present Yule­tide in favour of a friends together event with music and fun and smiles — it was the best ever. I’ll always remem­ber this while I can’t remem­ber any of the presents I was given for the last 10 years. Says it all — WE are the presents!
    John Sherry´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..How To Get To The TopMy Profile

  8. Love this idea Jayson! We do this all year. We also re-gift and do 2nd hand shop­ping for every­one. The kind of gifts we love to do for Christ­mas are expe­ri­ences now, like help with a ski pass, restau­rant gift cert. or a gro­cery coupon for my kids. And I think the favorite gift of my three teenage boys is socks!
    Great food for thought!!
    Betsy at Zen Mama´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Some Inspi­ra­tional Buys And A Zen Mama Give Away!My Profile

  9. Fabrizio says:

    Jayson, great mes­sage. I agree with what you say. It’s almost as if gifts are more impor­tant than human rela­tions.
    I watched a few movies lately that con­tained a sim­i­lar mes­sage. You can click on the link to read about them in my blog:
    http://fabpoli.blogspot.com/2011/11/what-movies-taught-me.html

  10. Vernon says:

    This is really a good mes­sage jayson. You know what here in our fam­ily we just exchange gift with our rel­a­tive but those gift are not to expen­sive enough. We gift a 2nd hand stuff and also 75% off in the the shop­ping store.
    Vernon´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..how to meet womenMy Profile

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  1. […] Do we really need to buy each other more stuff? Great ques­tion – and pretty good answer from Jayson Gad­dis. What do you think? […]

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