Explore, Commit, Emerge

by Lance Ekum on · 75 comments

Explore Commit Emerge
Creative Commons License photo credit: Stuck in Customs

“We shall not cease from explo­ration
And the end of all our explor­ing
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.”

~ T.S. Eliot

What are You Exploring?

Two months ago and it just sort of hit me.

Why am I doing this?  

That was the ques­tion I asked myself…I asked, and didn’t have an answer.  Well…not an answer that really felt “right”.

On the sur­face, it sure looked like every­thing was good and fine. {with every­thing in my life}  On the surface…until I looked a bit deeper. 

Have you ever had that feel­ing like you’ve been the “ham­ster on the wheel”, just going in circles…except, for why?  {Why do you do the things you do?}  Or, for me:  why was I doing the things I did?  And when I paused long enough to ask myself that question…I just didn’t have a good answer for the why

We all have amaz­ing gifts we bring to this world.  You.  Me.  Everyone. 

Have we become like the ham­ster, though?  Are our lives like the ham­ster wheel, as we blindly spin through our day…and then start it all over again? 

…and on the sur­face it all looks good and wonderful…

That makes me think about the image we project, is it our true image? 

Or do we cre­ate safety zones.  Safety zones such as our job, our fam­ily, our hob­bies, our habits.  Safety zones that give us that sur­face look of good and fine?  Safety zones that buffer our true image?  Is there some­thing deeper beyond these safety zones, though? 

{Are there parts of you that feel vul­ner­a­ble?  Is there a zone that feels unsure?  Do you some­times won­der why…why you’re doing what you do?}

Back to these last cou­ple of months for me…(it seems like I am eas­ily side­tracked…)  A time to explore the “why” behind all that I do, all that I am.

A time to go past that safety zone (the one of career, fam­ily, this site…).

…a time to go deeper, a time to lis­ten, a time to be…

Some­times, per­haps, that has to be a very soli­tary jour­ney.   Not a time to be an open book…a time to open the book.  Not a time to lay it all on the line…a time to really see the line.  Not a time to bare the soul…a time to look into soul, in all its nakedness.

And so it has been.

The Com­mit­ment

I don’t even remem­ber now, what it was that trig­gered the thought…the thought of tak­ing this blog­ging sab­bat­i­cal I’ve been on.  I’ve decided it doesn’t mat­ter, though.  What’s mat­tered is what this time has meant.  What’s mat­tered is the com­mit­ment I made to do this, because it just “felt right”.  You know that “voice within”…your intu­ition, gut feel­ing, inner vibe, sixth sense..  We all have this (now, whether we are lis­ten­ing or not…that’s another story). 

It felt, in a way, like I was aban­don­ing every­thing I had cre­ated here in this space.  {have you ever felt like you’re aban­don­ing some­thing deeply mean­ing­ful to you?}

That voice though, when I really lis­tened, was speak­ing very clearly.  Was speak­ing very clearly to me.

And so, a com­mit­ment to pause.

More than just a com­mit­ment to pause, though — this was a com­mit­ment to me, to be still and listen.

Might it feel vul­ner­a­ble? {yes}

Might it take me out of the safety zones I por­trayed? {yes}

Might I sway off course from my own per­sonal com­mit­ment? {yes}

Might it all be so worth it, all that would come from this com­mit­ment to me?  {a resound­ing yes}

These past many weeks have been all of this. 

  • I’ve ques­tioned if I really know my pur­pose here (both here in this space, and for my time here on earth). 
  • I’ve ques­tioned how much it mat­ters that I know this. 
  • I’ve ques­tioned if I’m liv­ing fully and authen­ti­cally to words which hold deep mean­ing for me:

“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intel­li­gent peo­ple and the affec­tion of chil­dren … to leave the world a bet­ter place … to know even one life has breathed eas­ier because you have lived.  This is to have suc­ceeded.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emer­son

  • I’ve ques­tioned what it means to be vulnerable. 
  • I’ve ques­tioned the why of all that I do. 
  • I’ve ques­tioned what holds me back from shin­ing my own light.

And I’ve com­mit­ted to liv­ing.  Living…in the full sense of that word, and all it brings with it.

The Emerg­ing

So today I return to this space…and every­thing is the same, and every­thing is different.

The emerg­ing will con­tinue (as per­haps, on some level, it does for all of us).  For me, this emerg­ing is with deeper clar­ity and purpose.

Today, I choose to con­tinue to emerge…emerge not just on the sur­face, but from all parts of me.   And this space will con­tinue to evolve as this new unfold­ing continues.

How about you?  How do you choose to emerge?

journey toward your true peak
Creative Commons License photo credit: K2D2vaca

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less trav­eled by,
And that has made all the difference.

~ Robert Frost

May our jour­ney together here con­tinue to enlighten all of us…

Lance writes sto­ries from his heart, aim­ing to inspire and moti­vate, as you align more fully with YOUR true peak. When he’s not here, you can find him hang­ing out with his fam­ily, rid­ing a bike, or just gen­er­ally act­ing goofy.   Sign up for the Thoughts from the Tree­house newslet­ter and get addi­tional inspi­ra­tion in your email inbox!
Lance Ekum
View all posts by Lance Ekum

{ 75 comments… read them below or add one }