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Givent Ake

Once there was a man named Givent Ake. Givent had a life that from the out­side peo­ple might appear green with jeal­ousy. He had it all, one might say. A big fancy house with lush gar­dens and a swim­ming pool, fancy cars, and vaca­tion homes scat­tered through­out the world, which were often the gath­er­ing place of celebri­ties and high pro­file guests.

Givant was mar­ried with two chil­dren. His wife, Gabby, was very active in non-profit vol­un­teer activ­i­ties, and enjoyed mak­ing sure that her name was on sev­eral build­ings for her gen­er­ous con­tri­bu­tions to the com­mu­nity. She loved the spot­light. Gabby dressed impec­ca­bly, had her nails done once a week, and hired a maid to keep up around the house and help with the chil­dren, who were dri­ven to a pri­vate school daily.

Givent Ake was a busi­ness man. When he talked with peo­ple he drew them in with his charis­matic per­son­al­ity and easy con­ver­sa­tion. But there were ulte­rior motives. Givent hid behind his façade of kind­ness to pro­pel him for­ward finan­cially and to feel pow­er­ful. For the deep blue shad­ows in his eyes revealed that these acquain­tances, these “friends” were only being wooed because they had some­thing he wanted in the future when he needed to cash in favors. He lived by the motto “I’ll scratch your back if you scratch mine.”

Now in a nearby town, there was a lady named Lotta Faith. Lotta lived a sim­ple life. She lived in an older house and lived below her means. Although she didn’t have chil­dren, she was a won­der­ful teacher and men­tor for trou­bled youth in an alter­na­tive school. Dur­ing the hol­i­day, instead of gifts, she would clean out her clos­ets and donate to the local char­i­ties for fam­i­lies in need. She would hand-make items and write deep, long, let­ters to fam­i­lies and friends thank­ing them for the gifts that they were giv­ing to the world through merely exist­ing. She was never long in face or short on a com­pli­ment, even to a stranger.

Lotta had no desire for recog­ni­tion. Often times she would per­form ran­dom acts of kind­ness. And each week, she would stop by the cor­ner park of Main Street and 10th, where old Ernest claimed a bench of his own.

“How are you today, Ernest?” she would say.

“Same as ever, dear. Still tick­ing, God knows why,” Ernest would mum­ble, his hoarse throat barely a whisper.

Lotta would sit down next to the man with the twin­kle in his sad blue eyes and they would begin the famil­iar con­ver­sa­tion that had become part of their greet­ing rou­tine. She enjoyed his pres­ence. She always felt bet­ter sit­ting, lis­ten­ing to his sto­ries, telling and some­times ask­ing his advice about the trou­bled kids she worked with, with­out break­ing their con­fi­den­tial­ity. When it was time to go, Lotta would hand Ernest a brown paper bag, filled with his favorite turkey and cheese sand­wich, mus­tard only. And cook­ies. Two home­made choco­late chip. Ernest would smile, and say,

“Thank you dear. Not many peo­ple take the time to really talk. But every­one sure thinks they have impor­tant things to say! You keep the faith, now, ya hear?”

One week later, two days before Christ­mas, Lotta stopped by the park and Ernest wasn’t there. She asked the cor­ner shop­keeper, who allowed Ernest to warm up in his shop occa­sion­ally, if he had seen the old man.

“Ernest passed away last week. Appar­ently a heart attack. We didn’t know where to find you. His chil­dren wanted you to know he spoke of you fondly, and often.”

“I didn’t know he had fam­ily” she whis­pered, vis­i­bly shaken.

“Oh yes! Old Ernest was well-known around here. I thought you knew?!”

“Knew what?”

“Why, Ernest was once named Givent Ake. He had a beau­ti­ful wife, although she talked way too much…..” he paused.

“Well, they had two lovely chil­dren. He was a mil­lion­aire, you know.”

“Go on. Please….”

“Well, Ernest, or Givent, lived the high life. He didn’t have many friends. He pre­tended to be a friend to many, but he used peo­ple. He would only give to those whom he wanted some­thing in return.

His wife died in a tragic car acci­dent ten years ago. He changed his life after that. Vowed to appre­ci­ate every moment, and against his grown children’s wishes, decided to go incog­nito and start to walk the streets every day, only com­ing home to a mod­est home at night. He was try­ing to under­stand the human conditional.”

“The human con­di­tional?” asked Lotta. “You mean the human con­di­tion?”

“No. The human con­di­tional. Ernest said that most peo­ple he met had the ten­dency to only give on con­di­tional terms, depen­dent on what they could take back. He used to be that way when his name was Givent Ake. Said he was cursed the day he was born because of his namesake.

The last sev­eral years of his life have been filled with deep sor­row and regret, but also wis­dom and com­pas­sion. Why, he even helped me put my son through col­lege! And remem­ber that anony­mous dona­tion to your school? That was him! That was Ernest! I promised I would never tell….but, you know.”

Lotta stepped back. Then she under­stood the many con­ver­sa­tions she had with Ernest. And with her head held a lit­tle higher, know­ing she was blessed with her given name, she set out to con­tinue an Ernest jour­ney to change the Givent Akes of the world.

Moral of the story? You have to have a Lotta Faith, and for­get about Givent Ake. For life, my friends, is not about give and take. It is about being Ernest in your ges­tures of good will, giv­ing uncon­di­tion­ally, know­ing that as con­nected human beings the rewards will come in mys­te­ri­ous ways and through peo­ple and events that you do not expect.

Wish­ing you all the Ernest Spirit of Lotta Faith, Giv­ing, and Har­mony as we jour­ney through this hol­i­day season!

by Jen Slay­den

Jen Slay­den finds her har­mony in West­ern Mon­tana with her hus­band Mark, their three kids, and an out­door lov­ing black lab named Cody. Stop by and check out her life in music, words, and edu­ca­tion at Find Your Har­mony.
Jen Slayden
View all posts by Jen Slay­den
Filed Under: Family and Social Life, Jungle Writers

Comments

  1. Jacqueline says:
    December 4, 2011 at 8:02 am

    A lovely story Jen and a great reminder that giv­ing comes from the heart. It’s not about putting your name on a build­ing or show­ing every­one how much of your money you can give away. Mak­ing an impact through giv­ing can be as sim­ple as being kind to a stranger or tak­ing the time to show a home­less per­son respect and com­pas­sion. Have a won­der­ful hol­i­day sea­son.
    Jacqueline´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Cyber Giv­ing Mon­day Novem­ber 28thMy Profile

    Reply
    • Jen says:
      December 5, 2011 at 6:13 pm

      Jacque­line,
      Thank you so much. It only takes a smile, a hug, or a gen­uine con­cern for another per­son to really make an impact. And the hol­i­days are a good reminder that com­pas­sion should be gen­er­ated through­out the year, for after all the phys­i­cal gifts have been long for­got­ten, a gift of kind­ness stays in my heart for­ever!
      Happy Hol­i­days to you as well.
      In Har­mony,
      Jen
      Jen´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Cyber-Monday and BEYOND: Music and Books that make you smile!My Profile

      Reply
  2. Jennifer says:
    December 4, 2011 at 8:52 am

    Lovely, Jen. I appre­ci­ate this time of year for remind­ing us to give and give thanks. Some­times time and recog­ni­tion are the best gifts of all. Bless­ings to you.
    Jennifer´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Stay Pos­i­tive Dur­ing Your Job SearchMy Profile

    Reply
  3. susan says:
    December 4, 2011 at 9:22 am

    Jen, that was so touch­ing — and very timely. This is the time of year one can get so caught up in “stuff” — the plas­tic side of the Christ­mas Sea­son. Being Ernest is pretty much the same thing as being con­scious. Liv­ing con­sciously — a great goal!
    Hugs
    Susan
    susan´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Beauty in Your Bones — Osteo­poro­sis Be Gone!My Profile

    Reply
  4. Cathy | Treatment Talk says:
    December 4, 2011 at 10:30 am

    Hi Jen,

    I enjoyed your story and your mes­sage. Tak­ing the time each day to give some­thing to some­one else, even if it’s very small with­out any thought of return brings hap­pi­ness not only to the other per­son, but to our­selves as well. You did a won­der­ful job of illus­trat­ing the idea of the impor­tance of giv­ing from the heart.
    Cathy | Treat­ment Talk´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Monthly Mes­sage – Novem­ber 2011My Profile

    Reply
    • Jen says:
      December 5, 2011 at 6:19 pm

      Hi Cathy,
      This post actu­ally came about from my OWN strug­gle of feel­ing like some­one who sup­ported me com­pletely flaked out. I, in fact, (and per­haps all of us) have a lit­tle of Givent Ake AND Lotta Faith in all of us. I felt hor­ri­ble and guilty that I had EXPECTED some­thing from this friend but through this jour­ney con­tinue to learn that we have bless­ings come back in abun­dance. Per­haps not from the per­son we expect. For instance, a few peo­ple I didn’t expect any sup­port from stepped for­ward. So by let­ting go of attach­ment to out­come from OTHERS, I have to trust that life will bring huge bless­ings my way. It frees me to GIVE and GIVE fully from the heart, with­out any other moti­va­tion but pure joy and love and humanity.

      In Har­mony,
      Jen
      Jen´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Cyber-Monday and BEYOND: Music and Books that make you smile!My Profile

      Reply
  5. sheila says:
    December 4, 2011 at 10:56 am

    Awwwwwwwwww great story!
    sheila´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Com­ment on Delight­ful Gifts! by SheilaMy Profile

    Reply
  6. Merna says:
    December 4, 2011 at 12:57 pm

    A touch­ing story that really brings home the idea that we need to be truly present for each other and by doing so we actu­ally gain so much more than mak­ing con­tacts about give-and-take. Read­ing this makes me want to run out and find a bench where I can have some mean­ing­ful con­ver­sa­tions. Thanks Jen — inspi­ra­tional and moves the heart for sure.

    Reply
    • Jen says:
      December 5, 2011 at 6:21 pm

      Hi Merna,
      Thank you! Boy, I think every town needs a “bench”. I see it now.…a remake of Lucy (from Peanuts) but every­body tak­ing turns talk­ing from the heart about life, issues, and con­nect­ing on a level that is beyond our ordi­nary small talk.

      I am so glad you stopped by.
      Have a beau­ti­ful hol­i­day, Merna!
      In Har­mony,
      Jen
      Jen´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Cyber-Monday and BEYOND: Music and Books that make you smile!My Profile

      Reply
  7. Audra Krell says:
    December 4, 2011 at 1:53 pm

    Won­der­ful, inspi­ra­tional story Jen. Thank you for shar­ing such a timely piece!
    Audra Krell´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Money Secrets of the AmishMy Profile

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  8. David Stevens says:
    December 4, 2011 at 4:31 pm

    That’s some story Jen,
    Thank you.….always share the care.
    be good to your­self
    David
    David Stevens´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..When I close my eyes…….My Profile

    Reply
  9. Evelyn Lim says:
    December 4, 2011 at 7:26 pm

    Lovely lovely story with a touch­ing inspi­ra­tional mes­sage. Thank you for shar­ing!
    Eve­lyn Lim´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..12 Days of Christ­mas Magic 2011My Profile

    Reply
  10. Jean Burman says:
    December 4, 2011 at 8:56 pm

    Great story Jen… so beau­ti­fully con­ceived :-)

    While it doesn’t always fol­low that the wealthy are always oppor­tunis­ti­cally count­ing… some­times it does. And some­times the poor are poor because some­where along the line they for­got to give. Kind­ness and gen­eros­ity is within the grasp of every­body regard­less of their socioe­co­nomic cir­cum­stances. Every sin­gle one of us has some­thing to give.

    Thanks again Jen :-)
    Jean Burman´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Squall [NEW VIDEO]My Profile

    Reply
    • Jen says:
      December 5, 2011 at 6:32 pm

      Jean,
      I really appre­ci­ate the per­spec­tive you bring here. Yes, I am in agree­ment with you! I was not sure where the story was going as I started click­ing away, but you are absolutely right. I have known (and DO know) the most gen­er­ous wealthy friends that are absolutely imper­a­tive to the health of some of the non-profits in my area. And I have (and do) know some peo­ple who are bit­ter and broke because they never learned self-love or responsibility.

      “Every sin­gle one of us has some­thing to give” really res­onates with me. It reminds me of a hymn that I have heard:
      “Every­body has some­thing to offer. Even the prince and the pau­per…“
      Kind­ness equals peace.
      Thank you so much for shar­ing.
      In Har­mony,
      Jen
      Jen´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Cyber-Monday and BEYOND: Music and Books that make you smile!My Profile

      Reply
  11. Betsy at Zen Mama says:
    December 4, 2011 at 11:05 pm

    Jen,
    This is beau­ti­ful! One of my favorite things you’ve ever writ­ten! Thanks to you and Lance for sharing!!

    Reply
  12. Debbie @ Happy Maker says:
    December 6, 2011 at 4:04 pm

    Won­der­ful story Jen, thank you for shar­ing it. Life is about just lov­ing and giv­ing with a smile. Do we really ever know Who we are talk­ing to at times?

    Thanks again and bless­ing to you,
    Deb­bie
    Deb­bie @ Happy Maker´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..The Signs of a Hap­pily Mar­ried CoupleMy Profile

    Reply
    • Jen says:
      December 7, 2011 at 5:45 am

      Hi Deb­bie!
      I like your ques­tion! (Do we really ever know who we are talk­ing to at times?) Some­times I find things out about peo­ple I have known for YEARS and think “how did I NOT know that?” I won­der if I wasn’t fully engaged or present.

      Giv­ing with a smile! YES! Happy hol­i­days and peace to you, Deb­bie!
      In Har­mony,
      Jen
      Jen´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..Cyber-Monday and BEYOND: Music and Books that make you smile!My Profile

      Reply
  13. Galen Pearl says:
    December 6, 2011 at 7:27 pm

    Lovely story, espe­cially this time of year!
    Galen Pearl´s Last Fab­u­lous Post ..From Vic­tim to VictorMy Profile

    Reply
  14. Anne Graham says:
    December 6, 2011 at 10:02 pm

    Jen, what a won­der­ful, lov­ing, clever story! This has been a year full of thoughts of giv­ing for me. Your reminders will hope­fully help me to keep that sen­ti­ment through­out the sea­son and beyond.

    Anne

    Reply

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