Instead of, Try

Instead of:

• Max­ing out your credit cards as an indi­rect way of show­ing peo­ple you care about them.

Try:

• Writ­ing a heart­felt note telling some­one you care about them. Pair it with a small token of thanks: freshly-baked cook­ies, for exam­ple, or a small toy for their pet.

Instead of:

• Dri­ving your­self crazy rac­ing to hol­i­day par­ties and reunions that you don’t really want to attend.

Try:

• Giv­ing your­self a break. Say “no” to the invite, put on your fuzzy pajama slip­pers, and watch that roman­tic com­edy you haven’t had the time to see.

Instead of:

• Giv­ing money you can’t afford to char­ity, out of a sense of guilt or a desire for tax reduction,

Try:

• Becom­ing per­son­ally involved with a local cause. Bring bal­loons to child can­cer sur­vivors spend­ing the hol­i­days in the hos­pi­tal. Visit an elderly per­son spend­ing the hol­i­days alone.

Instead of:

• Giv­ing your busi­ness asso­ciates grief about the fact that their report is a week late,

Try:

• Giv­ing them a break. They’re under stress just as much as you are — maybe more.

Instead of:

• Giv­ing some­one a handout,

Try:

• Giv­ing them men­tor­ing, encour­age­ment, and advice so they can develop the con­fi­dence to suc­ceed on their own.

Instead of:

• Giv­ing your neigh­bor, your gro­cery store clerk, or your local gas sta­tion atten­dant a polite nod with lim­ited eye contact

Try:

• Giv­ing that per­son a hearty smile, direct eye con­tact, and a heart­felt inquiry into how their day is going.

Instead of:

• Giv­ing an anony­mous blog­ger grief for their polit­i­cal or reli­gious opinions,

Try:

• See­ing the world from their point of view, if only for a minute.

Instead of:

• Giv­ing resent­ment to some­one who wronged you,

Try:

• Giv­ing that per­son the ben­e­fit of the doubt.

Instead of:

• Giv­ing your atten­tion only to the peo­ple, places and causes that are most famil­iar to you,

Try:

• Giv­ing your­self the joy of expe­ri­enc­ing some­thing new and different.

by Paula Pant

Thanks to wise money man­ag­ing, Paula Pant has trav­eled to 27 coun­tries, pur­chased a 99-year-old Vic­to­rian home near cen­tral Atlanta’s most beau­ti­ful park, and has never — ever — had a penny in debt. Her blog, Afford Any­thing, is based on one rad­i­cal idea: money should never hin­der your dreams.

Paula Pant

View all posts by Paula Pant