Kindness Comes In Small Gestures

by Lance Ekum on · 83 comments

Unclaimed Mitten
Creative Commons License photo credit: Chris Campbell

“No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.” ~ Aesop

A cold morning, even for us.  Fresh snow from the day before blanketed the browned lawns throughout the neighborhood.  For a fourth grade boy, the draw toward the powdery white was too much.

The day was Friday.  In the comfort of a warmed car, we drove up to the bus stop.  Little Bear could wait with me for his bus to arrive.  The draw toward the powdery white…

Little Bear  needed to get out, to run in the fresh, white snow.  To make a snowball.  And at his bus stop, two other neighborhood girls were getting out of their car to wait for the bus, as well.  First grade.  Kindergarten.  New kids to our neighborhood, having just moved in within the past month.  On this cold morning, even for us, three kids now playing in the powdery white.

And then it happened.  Without prompting.  Not something I did.  Not something his mother had done.

The first grade girl was struggling to get her mittens on.  Hands freezing.  On this cold, cold morning.  Little Bear removed his gloves.  Set them down.  Little Bear then helped her to get her mittens on.  Cooling his hands to help her warm hers…  Unaware he was being watched.  Just doing this because it was “right”.

As his parent, I could say that it’s what we’ve taught him to do.  I could say we actively practice this at home.  That we talk about being kind, being polite, doing what’s “right”

And yet, I believe this act – this one small bit of kindness – was not something we taught.  Not something we practiced doing at home.  This one small bit of kindness  came from deep within, from knowing what is right.  From our built-in radar that says “this is right”.

What’s On Your Radar Screen?

We all have opportunities, every day, to be a little kinder.  To help.  To serve.  Is your built-in radar seeing these opportunities?  Or, have you become “too busy” to notice what’s on this radar screen?

Life happens.  For all of us.  It’s easy to focus on “me”.  We all seem to have enough to worry about, right?

Your built-in radar is picking up opportunities to share your kindness.  Slow down and take a look at that screen.  See what’s on there.  Then take a few simple moments out of your day, out of your world – to make someone else’s world better.  Be a light for others.  Spread good.

Kindness comes in small gestures…

Lance writes stories from his heart, aiming to inspire and motivate, as you align more fully with YOUR true peak. When he's not here, you can find him hanging out with his family, riding a bike, or just generally acting goofy.   Sign up for the Thoughts from the Treehouse newsletter and get additional inspiration in your email inbox!
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{ 79 comments… read them below or add one }

Cath Lawson December 11, 2008 at 5:19 am

Hi Lance – great story. It really is small acts of kindness that make the world a better place.


Evelyn Lim December 11, 2008 at 5:23 am

I like your post. Yes…kindness does not have to done in a Big gesture. It can be in little ways. I decided to give away a pair of boots to my helper today. I have only worn it once. It is an expensive pair. When I saw how she admired my shoes, I told her that she can have them! I knew that she’d appreciate it more than me. Based on her current financial position, she cannot afford one.

Evelyn Lim´s last blog post..Whose Pain Is This?


Jenny Mannion December 11, 2008 at 6:00 am

Hi Lance,
Beautiful story and you are so so right! There is always a way to show kindness. I love watching my kids demonstrate kindness to others and do believe that awareness comes from deep within. Sometimes we get so caught up in our “to dos” we lose that simple awareness of what we can do NOW. Kindness is contagious as well — a simple smile to a stranger (instead of averting our eyes as we are caught up in our own lives) – can even work wonders by bringing the other person back to the moment. Thanks Lance!
Love, Jenny

Jenny Mannion´s last blog post..Top Ten Thoughtful Gift Ideas for Under $20


Betsy December 11, 2008 at 6:28 am

Hi Lance – Such a precious story – you will remember this always. Children, I believe, are innately kind and helpful. We should learn from them. Thanks for a great reminder, good not only in this season of love and faith, but always.



Mindful Mimi December 11, 2008 at 7:41 am

It is the random acts of kindness from kids that warm our heart – because we know they are really meant. Yesterday our almost 1 year old (he can’t talk or walk yet) took a piece of bread and tried to shove it in the mouth of his 2,5 year old brother. How sweet was that?
Of course they are not taught these things directly. But children learn by copying what they see around them. So he must have copied what he saw his parents, family or friends do. He must circulate in a loving and giving environment for him to make such a gesture. Way to go Lance!
I was in a random act of kindness mood yesterday. My radar did not show anything available close by so I just went on and donated some money. It’s not as good as doing something at home, but it was the best I could come up with yesterday.

Mindful Mimi´s last blog post..10 ideas, 10 convictions – part 2


Karl - Work Happy Now December 11, 2008 at 8:07 am

What a well written story. Your son has a good heart. I think that as a parent we need to cultivate the best in our child and you did that. You deserve some credit.

Karl – Work Happy Now´s last blog post..Great Leadership Requires Great Communication – Duh!


MizFit December 11, 2008 at 8:15 am

such a great reminder/story, Lance.

and in todays economy it is easy for me to feel overwhelmed at all who need help and the paltry amount I have to give moneywise.
it’s about far more than that…

MizFit´s last blog post..Yummy Dietfood. Yes, People, it is possible…


Rachel December 11, 2008 at 8:42 am

Great story. Good to try and do something thoughtful for someone else every day.

Rachel´s last blog post..Like KEEN footwear? I do. Enter to win a free pair!!


Mike King December 11, 2008 at 9:02 am

If people would see and do something like this every day, the world would be a much much more enjoyable place for everyone. Great story lance!


Mark December 11, 2008 at 9:14 am

Nice reminder Lance. “Your built-in radar is picking up opportunities to share your kindness. Slow down and take a look at that screen. See what’s on there. Then take a few simple moments out of your day, out of your world – to make someone else’s world better. Be a light for others. Spread good” Thank you!


ginabad December 11, 2008 at 9:19 am

AWESOME post!! Thanks.

ginabad´s last blog post..Some updates…


love-ely December 11, 2008 at 9:39 am

Sometimes a small touch of kindness could give a big feeling.
Nice post, Lance.

love-ely´s last blog post..HIV / AIDS – Shame Or Disease


Liz Rosenbaum December 11, 2008 at 9:44 am

That is so sweet! What a wonderful son you have. 🙂 I cherish those moments when your kids do something so mature, loving and thoughtful… not long ago, I was at my 8 year old sons Parent Teacher conference. His teacher praised him all over the place for never saying a kind word, always helping others, etc. etc. On our way out to our car, my son was quiet for a moment and then said, “Mom? Thanks for being such a good mom to me.” I was a little surprised to hear this random thought come out of his mouth, so I asked him why he said that… his reply was, “Because you taught me how to be such a good boy.”

Wow. Like you, I realized that although we do try to teach him how to be kind, respectful and caring of others, THIS was all him. THIS was what he felt was right… and yet, to have him show appreciation to me, for being his parent was something I will always be grateful for.

Liz Rosenbaum´s last blog post..Comment on Slow Down And Take A Deep Breath by Melissa


Scott December 11, 2008 at 9:49 am

Your not giving yourself enough credit. I think it IS something that you’ve taught. Maybe not in the “if you see a girl with cold hands do this” kinda way, but if your teaching kindness then you have taught this to your son. You’ve probably taught also by being an example for him to follow.

What’s on my radar? Well it’s hard to keep me out of the center of the radar (picture those green submarine radars and it’s looking from the inside out) no matter how hard I try. I like to think my radar looks from the outside in. Not the case all the time, but I guess I’ve got to start somewhere.

Thanks for this post. I think you may have upgraded my radar system 🙂

Scott´s last blog post..Another Moment of Reflection


Audra Krell December 11, 2008 at 10:16 am

I agree;happy, generous, loving children come from wonderful parents. Having three boys of my own, I am so passionate about what precious hearts our men have. May it last him a lifetime and serve him and others well.

Audra Krell´s last blog post..iMemories – The Best Gift


Jannie December 11, 2008 at 10:31 am

I saw Kelly hugging a crying child the other day and it warmed my heart! So sweet.

Jannie´s last blog post..Austin Rain of Terror


Vered - MomGrind December 11, 2008 at 11:00 am

It’s easy to become so busy, so absorbed in our daily tasks, that we don’t notice these opportunities anymore. Being kind requires us to slow down and observe.


chris December 11, 2008 at 12:14 pm

I disagree…Little Bear learned how to be kind because of what you and your wife do everyday. Children do pick up the little things that we do.

Anyway, I have a lot of opportunity to do small acts of kindness every day because Chicago rush hour traffic allows me so. I always yield to people and when a driver is in a rush and decides to tail me, I help him or her by slowing down even more so that s/he can also slow down to smell the roses… 😉

chris´s last blog post..I Shall Return


brandi December 11, 2008 at 12:26 pm

I came to terms awhile ago that the really important stuff was almost never large and grandiose.

it was doing the small gestures every day.

what a joy it must have been to see your little bear’s kindness. what a tribute that is.

brandi´s last blog post..the obligatory about me post


Lance December 11, 2008 at 12:40 pm

@Cath – Small act of kindness, by many people, lead to all sorts of good happening! Thanks!

@Evelyn – I love that story of the boots Evelyn. It’s great because you’re helping someone you know, and it all feels more personal. Very cool!

@Jenny Mannion – A smile! How easy is that to do! That’s great Jenny – it’s so easy, we can do it many, many times each day – sharing a little “love” with the world, one smile at a time! Seeing this in children, especially unprompted, really is a special sight.

@Betsy – As I sat and watched this all transpire, I couldn’t help but think the same thing. Here’s a kid who “claims” he doesn’t like girls (sounds about right for 4th grade) – helping willingly. Very special moment, for sure! And a great message of giving, now during the Christmas season, and more than that, a great message for all time…

@Mindful Mimi – That is very sweet – and fits exactly to what I’m thinking here – that we have this genuine attitude of giving/helping deep within all of us. Here is your 1 year old child “giving” to his brother! And, yes, I agree that kids do learn by what they see. Thank you, Mimi, for your kind work – yet, still, I don’t deserve any credit for this act – I really believe that this was done truly because he felt he could, and should, help this younger girl. And what a nice way to give on your part – even if it’s not “local” or “personal”, you’re helping someone to get a start – and that’s really awesome!

@Karl – Thanks, Karl, and yet, like I said to Mimi – I really believe he did this out of the goodness of his heart – something that was deep within him – that’s deep within us all – that sometimes we just “know”….

@MizFit – Thanks MizFit! Yes, it’s not always about the money. It IS so much more than that…

@Rachel – Doing this everyday, just think of what that could mean! Wow!

@Mike – Yes, if we could do something like this everyday – I have to think our world and how we view it would be drastically different… Thanks Mike!


Lance December 11, 2008 at 12:40 pm

@Mark – Thanks Mark!

@Ginabad – Your welcome!

@Love-ely — This really left a big feeling of good with me!! Thanks!

@Liz – I was thinking he was pretty wonderful when this was happening (why isn’t he always like this???). What your son did – both in class – and even more – going home with you – what a special moment for you two! And when they do this, don’t you just feel like they are doing this for the “right” reasons – not because they’re expected to, not because they’re told to…Done because it just felt right to do… Thank you, Liz, for sharing that wonderful story here today!

@Scott – I do agree that we teach our children certain behaviors, and the importance of helping out. Still, this just really seemed like it was all him – doing what he knew, deep down, was right. And, the idea of looking from the outside in – that’s a good point – as I take it – we have to work on ourselves, too – sometimes before we are ready to help others. Great point, Scott…

@Audra – Thank you Audra! We do, as parents, help to instill certain characteristics in our children. Seeing them perform acts of kindness, unprompted, is really a special feeling! I, too, hope that this is something he carries with him always…

@Jannie – Kelly (your daughter, yes?) – a very touching example of being there for someone else in a time of need. And, I’m sure this is another example of her doing this from the “bottom of her heart”, not because she was told to… Very sweet…

@Vered – We get busy, and all of a sudden – we’re so absorbed in what we’re doing, that we don’t notice the world around us – and all it’s hurts, it’s suffering, it’s need…

@Chris – Thank you, and yes – I agree that our children do learn from us. So, maybe part of this is our doing – in what we’ve taught him. Still, I do believe that this had to come from him – that he just knew, deep down, that he should help this little girl. Okay, your story about rush hour traffic – I love it – doing your part to help people slow down and “smell the roses” (or, at least the car fumes!).

@Brandi – Sometimes it seems like what we’re doing is so small or insignificant – and yet, that’s completely wrong. Every act we do (small or large) has an impact. And, I believe, that sometimes it’s the small acts that have the biggest impact. It was a complete joy to watch this all happen – a moment I’ll never forget…


Sagan December 11, 2008 at 1:05 pm

That is so sweet! I’m actually tearing up right now (could also be because my hormones are messed up. But still).

The tiniest gestures can mean the world.

Sagan´s last blog post..Life Lessons: Food Photo Diary


Cricket December 11, 2008 at 1:22 pm

Oh Lance, he is learning how to be polite from the examples that you and your family are setting. This is one of those moments you sit back and say “AHHHH”…I love being a parent.

Cricket´s last blog post..Who would have thought?


Jamie December 11, 2008 at 2:20 pm

Lance – great story and very nicely written.We talk about this all of the time at our house, how little things matter. The big things, like getting married, paying off a mortgage, having a child, etc. are of course important too, but they happen few and far between. On the other hand, little things happen daily, and when they’re simple acts of kindness like helping someone with their mittens, they all add up to be much more meaningful than the big things. These daily “small” things are life, enjoy them.

Jamie´s last blog post..Here’s a Method Today’s Parents are Using to Connect With Their Teens


Jean Browman--Cheerful Monk December 11, 2008 at 2:37 pm

Your son reminds me of my daughter. We’re blessed.

Jean Browman–Cheerful Monk´s last blog post..I Rescued a Human Today


Maya December 11, 2008 at 2:51 pm

You are such a good story teller!

And what a proud parent you must be 🙂 – isn’t it such joy when we notice these little things – the things they do of their own accord ….the things we hope we have taught them.

Maya´s last blog post..A Simple Happiness Equation: A Picture


Julie December 11, 2008 at 3:08 pm

Your teachings, the fun of fresh snow, the super cold temps, a newcomer—so many things speaking to a young child’s heart…of course your son heard his heart. He hasn’t yet cluttered it with the accumulation of things as we have! Children often are very beautiful mirrors, shining back to us those lessons we still—and always—need to hear. “Kindness” is one of the biggest we need to remember. With all that stuff we carry around with us all the time, we’re often walled off from what most matters. Please give Little Bear a big hug of thanks from me!

Julie´s last blog post.."A Flower for the World"


Lance December 11, 2008 at 4:27 pm

@Sagan – It’s the small things that really can make a difference…and I thought it was pretty sweet of him, too!

@Cricket – It was a moment where I did feel really good, you’re right Cricket! Not to get off-track — why is it I also remember the moments where he has me pulling my hair out (no wonder they tell me I’m getting a little thin up there!). This one, this moment, though, really was one worth remembering – it just really seemed so sincere…

@Jamie – Great point Jamie – about big things vs. little things. They all matter, except the big things are things that happen infrequently. So, the place where we can have the biggest impact is really in doing lots of little things. And oftentimes, little acts of kindness mean the world the the person receiving it…

@Jean – Sounds like your daughter is a very kind soul, you are indeed blessed Jean!

@Maya – Thank you Maya! At this moment, yes, I was very proud of our little guy! And especially since he was doing this out of the goodness of his heart – very special moment!

@Julie – That was what was so cool, Julie – he heard his heart all by himself, and then acted upon what we was “hearing”. And you’re right, because when I looked at him, at this moment, what I saw shining back at me was truly a beautiful soul at work! And done with no ulterior motive, not looking to get something in return – doing this one act of kindness “just because”… And, he like hugs too, so I’ll pass one on to him…


Laurie December 11, 2008 at 5:54 pm

When such a kind act is so spontaneous, much like a reflex, it says so much about character of the person. Some hearts are just so tender, compassionate, giving. Those are the souls whose light gives us hope and let’s us know that without a doubt, there is a God and He just revealed himself in a fourth grader.
Grace and Peace to you Lance


Marelisa December 11, 2008 at 7:04 pm

Hi Lance: I love this story. Kids who are kind and gentle toward others tend to come from homes where people are kind and gentle toward them.

Marelisa´s last blog post..Fun, Whimsical Gift Ideas for Creative People


Barbara Swafford - Blogging Without A Blog December 11, 2008 at 10:18 pm

Hi Lance – What a beautiful story. I also love the message of spreading kindness. It’s so easy to do, yet we often forget to do it. Thanks for the reminder. This is the perfect time of year to begin anew. 🙂

Barbara Swafford – Blogging Without A Blog´s last blog post..When Your Truth Is Different Than Mine


Davina December 11, 2008 at 10:57 pm

Hi Lance. What a beautiful story. The simple acts of kindness bring a lot of fulfillment. Making an extra effort to pause when in a hurry, just to hold the door for the next person, to make eye contact, and see them smile. This moves mountains.

Davina´s last blog post..Future Self Meditation Invites Guidance


Caroline December 12, 2008 at 2:13 am

Heartwarming story! Just today, I was given a gift card to a store I rarely shop at…I bought a few things and had about a $10 dollar balance (not a lot). As I was walking out of the store, I handed the card to a woman. I think she thought I was nuts! I told her that I don’t think I will ever use this… so enjoy it. I love doing things like that! It just feels good!

Caroline´s last blog post..Good places to go…


Rupal December 12, 2008 at 5:15 am

OMG. I have chills. great great great post. In the last year I moved overseas and it has forced me to slow down my life, for many reasons, but the main, being that I’m in a totally new and unfamiliar place, knowing no one but my hubby and dog, unsure how to get from place A to B without checking a map or relying on the kindness of a stranger. Huge change for us is living in a real life bustling city like London where no one is concerned for anyone but themselves. Coming from Texas, I am worlds away from the texan hospitality here, but I strive to maintain the little acts of generosity wherever I can with eye contact, ‘good morning’ and ‘good day’. A little kindness goes a long way, for both me and them. Thanks for this post! And your kiddo was just mimicking what he had seen in his parents, so keep up the good work.

Rupal´s last blog post..Go Nuts!


Lance December 12, 2008 at 6:04 am

@Laurie – You said it so well, Laurie! This really was one of those moments where it felt like God’s hands truly were at work! And that there is much that is good and right in this world…

@Marelisa – Thank you Mare! Like I’ve said several times, I really do believe he did this from the true goodness of his heart. And yet, your point is noted – we do learn what we see. So, maybe there is some combination – like he knew how he should help from what he has viewed before – yet the whole knowing that he should do something – I believe that really did come from his soul… Again, thank you, Mare. Your words mean much to me.

@Barbara – Thank you Barbara! It’s a great message, and what I thought made it so great – was that it was completely unplanned, and without the thought of any ulterior motives. It just was. And that’s what made is so awesome!

@Davina – Simple acts of kindness are so good, for both the giver and the receiver. Everyone gets so much from these small acts. And things as small as a smile, or holding a door open – great examples of things that are so easy to do – and can mean so much – sometimes we never know just how much…

@Caroline – Thank you Caroline! And, I love the gift card story- what a great way to “surprise” someone, in a wonderful way! She may have thought you were nuts, although I’m guessing she also felt really good at that moment, too! And who knows how she might continue to pass that kindness on to others – and that’s the real beauty of kindness – how it can spread in amazing way! Thank you for sharing that story here today, Caroline!

@Rupal – Thank you Rupal! And, I’m sure it can be very difficult living in a new city, where you don’t know anyone. Especially when the “lifestyle” is very different from what you’re used to. That you’re continuing to live as you always have – that is really very awesome! Even in a world that sometimes seem cold and hardened, your small acts are not small at all. In fact, I think they end up being huge for the receiver – and that’s a great thing you’re passing on!


LifeMadeGreat | Juliet December 12, 2008 at 7:07 am

Hi Lance

A beautiful moment. Kindness is of great importance to me. My favourite quote is from Seneca:
“Where ever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for a kindness”


LifeMadeGreat | Juliet´s last blog post..What To Do When Someone Is Unpleasant Towards You


Angel December 12, 2008 at 9:06 am

Excellent story, Lance. Everyday I strive to a make a difference. No matter how small. Let me give you an example of something so small can change a mood.

Last night I was training a client who was having a particularly difficult time executing the exercises. The entire session went pretty rough and she was getting very frustrated with herself. (It was visible on her face and in her quiet mumblings.) We made it through the session but the mood was not light as she was disappointed in herself and thought I, too, was disappointed. When I told her goodbye, she just nodded and headed to the door. Something within me was bothered and I didn’t like the fact that her spirit was down. So right before she walked out of the door, I screamed, “Sabrina!”. She turned around startled that I yelled her name. She looked at me and said, “yes?”. I shrugged my shoulders and put on my best coy, innocent kid look and said, “I luuuuvs you”. And a huge smile came across her face as she walked out the door.

My point? I hate seeing people sad and I want people to leave me with a good feeling. So if it means making myself look silly, I’m going to do it anyway. If I can bring a smile to your face, then my life has been well spent.

Angel´s last blog post..The woman who should’ve won Marine Corps


Stacey Shipman December 12, 2008 at 10:09 am

What a perfect time of year for a post like this. My newsletter went out this morning with a focus on “Giving from the heart instead of the wallet.” Just a little bit goes a very long way!! Easy to do, even easier to forget.

Stacey Shipman´s last blog post..Back to Your Senses Sunday: Do You Let the Weather Stop You?


Kristin T. December 12, 2008 at 11:11 am

What a perfect illustration of a small, everyday kindness, and the ripple effect it can have in the world. For starters, it’s clear that your own kindness practices have rippled out to your little boy, and now out to the neighbor girl.

Maybe, as adults, part of the problem is we think too big. We want to help in big ways, do big things, make big differences. And then, of course, we end up doing nothing at all, because we usually don’t have the time or energy to devote to the BIG. Kids remind us that we can be fed and satisfied by many small crumbs of goodness.

Kristin T.´s last blog post..Make love, not signs


Doug December 12, 2008 at 2:21 pm

Goes to show you that children should be everyone’s model for behavior…


Annette December 12, 2008 at 2:43 pm

beautiful! I have been seizing every chance I get to find those little gestures ;)………Lance…… motivate us to want to be kinder humans! Thanks for your gentle pushes 😉

Annette´s last blog post..My Inspiration 🙂 Along the Way


Mama Zen December 12, 2008 at 4:07 pm

That is so touching!

Mama Zen´s last blog post..Mama Zen Is Pleased To Announce . . .


Natural December 12, 2008 at 4:40 pm

Hey lance, that was a beautiful touching story. thanks for sharing. it’s nice when you see YOUR kids do something like that without telling them. it shows that they are thinking and not just about themselves, but other people.


Ian Peatey December 12, 2008 at 5:20 pm

Reading this left me with a warm, fuzzy feeling … and hope! The future of our world is in the hands of children such as yours (and mine) and this story shows those hands have the potential for greater compassion than many holding the world today. Thanks for sharing this. Ian

Ian Peatey´s last blog post..Doomed to be violently entertained


Lance December 12, 2008 at 6:08 pm

@LifeMadeGreat | Juliet – What a great quote, Juliet – pretty much always, then, huh – that there is an opportunity for kindness! Thanks for sharing!

@Angel – Thanks Angel! And, awesome story you’ve shared here today – I love it! So what if we act a little silly, or weird, or off-beat. If it’s helping someone else, if it’s giving someone a boost – it’s so worth it! Sabrina is lucky to have you in her life! I love your attitude Angel – very, very awesome!

@Stacey Shipman – I saw your newsletter – it looks great Stacey (and, really, some super information in there!). This stuff (kindness) is so easy to do, you’re right. And yet, your second point really hits upon something – as easy as it is to do, it’s even easier to forget. We get so busy with our own lives, that we forget how easy it is to do something simple for someone else…

@Kristin – I haven’t really thought much about the ripple effect here, and yet, that’s a great point you bring up, Kristin. While I believe that he did this because he “knew” it was the right thing to do, actually doing it – maybe part of that is because of something he has learned along the way. I still take little credit for this, as I think it really does have to start in his heart. Yet, I see your point about the ripple effect. And yes – sometimes BIG can seem overwhelming – and nothing happens. When, if we looked on a much smaller scale, making an impact is so much easier…

@Doug – We can learn a lot from children…

@Annette – Thank you Annette! …and I thank my son for the gentle push. Sometimes those pushes come when we least expect them.

@Mama Zen – Thank you!

@Natural – That was what made this so special – that it just happened spontaneously, without anyone telling him to do it. Concern for others, it’s such a great thing to see in people, to see this in action – very much, this was an inspiring moment for me…

@Ian Peatey – That’s a feeling I had too, Ian – one of hope. And my hoe, also, is that these moments aren’t fleeting moments, instead, ones that happen again and again. That age and everything that brings along with it do not tarnish the meaning of these experiences…


Grace Kleppin December 12, 2008 at 8:58 pm

For a desert rat like myself, I love your snow! And your description of an event that was so simple in nature but so profound in meaning. Thank you. G.

Grace Kleppin´s last blog post..Reframing the red roof


Jewel/Pink Ink December 13, 2008 at 7:46 am

Ah, that was wonderful, Lance. Little Bear had to learn this from someone, so kudos to you and your wife :-). I think children have an innate sense of kindness; I love how your story spotlights this. Far too often I hear now of the depravity that youth are capable of!

When I get out of my own concerns and serve others, I am blessed. Thanks for the reminder for me to get out there and see what mittens I can help with today. 🙂


Jewel/Pink Ink December 13, 2008 at 7:50 am

You’re the first to know, the hippo song was a success. If you measure success by how silly it felt! 🙂

It WAS really fun to do. Ah, I wish I had time to do community theater. Maybe someday. And my husband was such a cute sport…

Jewel/Pink Ink´s last blog post..To-Do List


Arswino December 13, 2008 at 8:04 am

Nice story, Lance. I always like a story about kindness.
Thanks for sharing.

Arswino´s last blog post..Bend, but Don’t Break


Tammie @ Are You For Real? December 13, 2008 at 8:38 am

Slow down and take notice of others … great piece of advice, Lance! Your son’s actions were a beautiful model of what Jesus said is to be priority in our lives … Love God and love others! It’s just that simple … and just that beautiful.

Tammie @ Are You For Real?´s last blog post..What Lovely Memories!


Daphne December 13, 2008 at 10:13 am

I love it when young boys are such gentlemen already. His sweet gesture is proof that he has internalised the values that you’ve been teaching and demonstrating. Isn’t it a wonderful feeling knowing that you’re releasing such a fine specimen of a human being into the world?

Daphne´s last blog post..Indulge In An Adult Sleepover


Kelly Turner December 13, 2008 at 11:37 am

sometimes i have blinders on. i need to open up and look around- its not always about me.

Your poists always make me feel bad about myself, lol. j/k- i think everyone needs to be reminded to be a better person.

Kelly Turner

Kelly Turner´s last blog post..I Have a BIG Suprise for Everyone!!


Robin Easton December 13, 2008 at 5:34 pm

Oh Lance this just moved me to tears. The way you said it came from deep within him and was already there, part of him, part of who we all are. I sooo agree with that. You are indeed wise to see this.

You son’s simple tiny act of kindness reminds us all who we REALLY are. It is never too late to return to who we really are. You know Lance, I read this and at the end I thought how I can’t go a day, I can’t even go to the store or the bank or wherever without living this reality of kindness. Do you know why? Because it is what makes ME feel soooo good and alive and above ALL ELSE, it fills me with hope. It fills my world with hope. When I do something like your son did I am infused with love and hope for humanity. It is a powerful feeling and one that I believe we all hunger for. But we have often forgotten that it is not in “me, me, me, gimme, gimme, gimme” that we will find this. It is in the stilled moments that we forget ourselves and reach out to someone else. These are our shinning moments of glory and grace as human beings.

This is a remarkable insight you share with us.
Thank you kind soul,

Robin Easton´s last blog post..Do Men Cry?


meleah rebeccah December 13, 2008 at 7:00 pm

Aw! Little Bear is too sweet. Thank you for sharing this with us.

meleah rebeccah´s last blog post..Pink Eye


Lance December 13, 2008 at 9:57 pm

@Grace – We were out sledding in the snow today – fun! And yet, it was cold too!! Yes, this was a moment, even though simple, that left a lasting effect on me. Thanks Grace!

@Jewel – I, too, think kids have a built in, innate kindness. And as we get older, that sometimes gets suppressed. Buried. And doesn’t come out as often as it should… There really is much good in our youth, sometimes it gets covered up because of other things that we “notice”… It’s there, though, just waiting to get out – the kindness, really, in all of us. The hippo song! Awesome Jewel (and hubby!)!! Silly is very successful in my book – it was fun for you two – and so I’m sure it was, also, for the audience! Pictures? Videos? There must be something, right Jewel?? Awesome job all around!!

@Arswino – Your welcome, glad you enjoyed it!

@Tammie – Yes, it is that simple! So, why is it so hard sometimes, as we get older, to remember this? It’s like we forget some of the very basic principles we have had, all in the name of get more done for ourselves. But at what price?

@Daphne – It really was a wonderful feeling, Daphne! How much I had to do with it, I’m not sure – yet, knowing that he was really doing this from the goodness of his heart, was very heart-warming for me…

@Kelly Turner – I think we can all be better, in some way. In fact, as I watched my son doing this, the thought that went through my head was – what would I have done in this situation, would I have even noticed she needed help? So, this stuff gets to me, too. And makes me think about how I would handle something like this… And that’s all good…

@Robin – I think that’s really it, Robin. We all have this in our heart and soul. It’s just a matter of letting it out. It can get buried, the older we get, if we let that happen – through the injustices of life, through the hardening we feel because of life circumstances. And yet, to be like a child, where we “do” just because. Why can’t we hang onto that? Not let life’s inustices force us to not listen to our heart. It IS in us all – you are right Robin! You are living this every day, what an inspiration to everyone in whose path your cross. You are an inspiration to me! I really feel this “from the heart goodness” in every word your write. And I can only imagine how this light of yours shines to those you are in live contact with. Very amazing, your journey and the people you have touched along the way Robin! So, thank you, Robin – for being a light of love and kindness in our world- you inspire so many to reach to new heights! May you continue to do this, all the days of your life…

@Meleah – He sure was sweet Meleah! Your welcome!


Jannie December 13, 2008 at 10:38 pm

Oh wow, I see I’m a Top Talker on your site now! (why does that not surprise me, Jannie who was nicknamed “gift of gab” at the age of 2 ?)

Jannie´s last blog post..A Biggie


Robin December 13, 2008 at 10:58 pm

Hi Lance – that’s a lovely story. It’s great to see his little radar is working so well! He must feel trusted and safe. Let’s trust that ours does, too. Cheers!

Robin´s last blog post..Festival Of Life


Stephen Hopson December 14, 2008 at 6:29 am

Wow, that was a beautiful, touching story. I felt as if it was a movie unfolding in front of me. A young kid helping another get her mittens on in the freezing cold weather.

You just pointed out something that I’ve believed in and that’s how everyone has innate goodness inside themselves when they’re just getting started with life. We all were born with compassion, kindness and a sense of love.

It’s not taught but a natural inner thing in all of us. Some of us repress it due to external circumstances while others flourish with kindness b/c our surrounding environments made it ripe for that to happen but we all have it when we’re born – what happens after that is anyone’s guess.

Stephen Hopson´s last blog post..End of the Week Gratitude Theme #56


Lance December 14, 2008 at 7:54 am

@Jannie – Hey, you’re a regular around here – and your voice is always welcome Jannie!! (and it doesn’t surprise me either, your gift of gab!!)

@Robin – His radar is “right” – and it was so neat to see – in action! Good for me, good for the soul…

@Stephen – Thank you, Stephen! That’s exactly it – that innate goodness that’s within us all – that’s exactly my thought on this! He did this act of kindness just because he “knew” it was the right thing to do. Maybe his home life helped him to know what to do when he knew something should be done – and yet the point is exactly as you’ve said Stephen – it’s a natural thing in all of us. Sadly, it does get depressed sometimes (I’ve noticed it in myself at times). I think we get consumed sometimes by our own “problems”, and neglect to see what else is right in front of us… Here’s to letting our compassion and kindness out in as many ways as possible!


Carla December 14, 2008 at 3:07 pm

Another tear jerking post for me! What a sweet story and great reminder for us all. 🙂

I think as we become adolescents and adults, we are jaded by the “evils” in the word and our hearts become hardened and fearful. Sometimes others may not appreciate our kindness, so we stop giving.

Carla´s last blog post..Why New Year resolutions dont work | Blogroll


Evita December 14, 2008 at 4:56 pm

Oh my goodness Lance that is such a cute and beautiful story. You indeed can be proud, but not just as a parent, but as a human being to witness such a special act of kindness. I think I would have had tears in my eyes watching this.

Oh kindness is so precious, and I hope that each of us can inspire more of it each day. Even by you writing and getting all of us to talk about this and focus on this type of energy it is so valuable and makes a bigger difference than some may think.

Evita´s last blog post..The Voices of Angels Around Us


Lance December 14, 2008 at 7:25 pm

@Carla – Thank you so much Carla. It really was a special moment, just to sit and watch it all unfold. And, I think you’re absolutely right – we become jaded – and our hearts just don’t open up as much. Yet when we do it, what a great feeling – for both giver and receiver.

@Evita – Thank you Evita, really, for your kind heart, and beautiful words. I love how you’ve stated this – about being proud, not only as a parent, but also as a human being. Seeing kindness unfold… it really was a moment where I, too, was very moved by the whole experience. The spontaneity of it all. I left that morning, with a renewed sense of goodness in my heart, all from such a small act…


buddhaofhollywood December 15, 2008 at 12:43 am

No act of kindness is too small!
Of course with the exception of the government bailouts.

buddhaofhollywood´s last blog post..Where is the love?


Lance December 15, 2008 at 7:25 am

@Buddhaofhollywood – We can all do something…that’s my take away here! Now…the government and bailouts…that just sounds like a mess, doesn’t it…


Natalia Burleson December 16, 2008 at 8:57 am

Hey Lance! Another great post! I have been trying to be more mindful of simple, random acts of kindness. I try to practice them around my son and more importantly for me, when he’s not around. So that it may, hopefully, become a natural part of my life, just because!

Natalia Burleson´s last blog post..Today.


Zandria December 16, 2008 at 9:41 am

Lance!!! That’s so beautiful. I know you were extremely proud of him at that moment. Sounds like he has some awesome role models. 🙂

Zandria´s last blog post..Confidence: Hold Your Head Up and Keep it There


Mama C December 16, 2008 at 2:41 pm

Lance, how awesome that is as a parent to witness your child do something so kind with no external prompting! I’m always telling my kids to say thank you, please, be polite, etc etc. and feeling like-when is this ever going to sink in? But truly, it’s not about what I tell them. And it’s not about being “polite”. It’s about what they observe me doing that is going to sink in.

What a good and gentle reminder you have given me to pay attention to those opportunities to serve. And it’s those little moments, helping those little ones, that count the most.

Mama C´s last blog post..Bright


Lance December 16, 2008 at 8:23 pm

@Natalia – Thank you, Natalia! Yes, when we can get to the point where we’re kind “just because” – what a great place to be! And, if we can pass some of that on to others in our life, what a gift we have given…

@Zandria – Thank you, so much, Zandria! You can’t imagine how proud of him I was at that moment – it was just a small gesture on his part, and yet something I will remember always…

@Mama C – That’s really what made this so special – that he did this all on his own. We, too, are telling our kids to use their manners, be helpful, etc. Sometimes it seems like it falls on deaf ears. And then there’s a moment like this. And that’s when you know, really know, that they “get it”. And not just at the surface, but deep down. From their heart, they get it. And that’s pretty awesome to witness!


Liara Covert December 19, 2008 at 6:52 pm

Lance, I love this story. It encourages people. Gestures of kindness cost no money. They simply require a genuine heart. As people attune to themselves, they rediscover what this means.

Liara Covert´s last blog post..5 Ways to reframe broken relationships


Lance December 20, 2008 at 7:30 pm

@Liara – That’s exactly it, kindness doesn’t have to cost a thing! It IS what’s in our heart, and when we really listen to it – wonderful things began to happen… Thank you, Liara, for reminding me that kindness doesn’t have to have a cost – it’s something we can freely give!


Leanne Magraith | Forever Change December 21, 2008 at 4:41 am

Little Bear certainly did pick up on gestures displayed by his parents there is no doubt about it. Kindness comes from the heart, and can be enhanced in the right environment. Great message you shared from this simple act you observed.

Leanne Magraith | Forever Change´s last blog post..Is Human Stupidity Infinite?


Lance December 22, 2008 at 9:06 pm

@Leanne – Well, thank you, Leanne, for your kind words. Watching this all play out was such a powerfully special experience for me. It was so simple, yet so special. And done without any prompting by anyone – very neat!


Jennifer December 31, 2008 at 1:18 am

Yes, little bear has learned from Papa Bear. Papa bear helped him find his radar.

My radar can use some dusting off so the reception is clear on the screen. Thanks for the reminder to look for the small opportunities that mean so much. You have a real knack for showing us these important lessons. Thanks to you, I’m going to start looking harder.

Jennifer´s last blog post..6 Ways to Compliment Someone


Lance December 31, 2008 at 7:28 am

Jennifer, thank you (I’m saying that a lot to you today, it seems!). I think that, although I may have helped him find his radar, it’s also something that he has within him – that he has also found himself. Watching this, I thought the same thing as you – my radar could be dusted off too. It’s so easy to be kind, in simple ways. Why do we sometimes not do it? I’m looking harder too, and it’s because of a little guy in my life who reminded me, through his actions, of what is truly important…


Tess The Bold Life January 2, 2009 at 9:30 am

I’m very aware of being kind and never pass up a chance. It always comes back tenfold!

Tess The Bold Life´s last blog post..Happy Holidays


Lance January 2, 2009 at 3:52 pm

Tess, thanks for stopping by! Very cool! I “try” to not pass up opportunities to be kind. Yet, I’m left wondering…are there things, sometimes, that I’m just not seeing because I get too caught up in me. And yet, you make an excellent point – about it coming back tenfold. Even if it’s not right away…


CG Walters January 8, 2009 at 6:54 am

Thank you for this, Lance, and all the work you do to make our world a better place.
many blessings to you and all you hold dear,

CG Walters´s last blog post..CelebraZine 05Jan09


Patricia - Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworker January 17, 2009 at 3:41 pm

If we aren’t too busy, our children can teach us so much about life. Enjoy every minute of your child’s time with you. My children are 31 and 32 years old. Even today, they still catch me by surprise with what they say and do with Life. My son made me feel so loved just two nights ago when he called, out of the blue, to say thank you for some things that I had done for him that day. My heart swelled with love.

Patricia – Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworker´s last blog post..Kindness—Why Is It Easier To Be Kind To Strangers?


Lance January 18, 2009 at 5:39 am

@CG Walters – Your welcome, and I appreciate your time here!

@Patricia – Very cool, Patricia. Thanks for sharing that here, about your son calling out of the blue. I think that’s a great reminder for all of us – something as simple as a telephone call can really brighten someone’s day.


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