Relationship Success: A Labor of Love

by Kelly Sajonia on · 3 comments


To be suc­cess­ful in a rela­tion­ship requires hard work.

This is some­thing often said as advice or is an obser­va­tion of what it takes to achieve a level of great­ness in a rela­tion­ship. It’s true, but “hard work” as a descrip­tion sounds exhaust­ing, neg­a­tive, and pos­si­bly frus­trat­ing; it doesn’t sound fun.

Does this mean one should not work at our relationships?

No, of course not.

But instead of read­ing the state­ment as an act of drudgery, it should be seen as what it truly is: an oppor­tu­nity to put forth an effort into some­thing that is worth the work involved. It is best to turn around the per­cep­tion of the work as some­thing hap­pily accomplished.

As for the work required in a lov­ing rela­tion­ship, it’s easy most of the time. Work means remem­ber­ing to say “I love you,” being kind and con­sid­er­ing, and express­ing love in more ways than words. These few exam­ples of “tasks” keep rela­tion­ships suc­cess­ful, but also feel good for both peo­ple involved.

Some­times the work is a bit more dif­fi­cult. It might mean say­ing “I am sorry,” for­giv­ing a part­ner, or choos­ing com­pro­mise over a win in an argu­ment. Like the eas­ier work, these too lead to rela­tion­ship success.

Sim­i­lar to the work required in rela­tion­ships, it’s also hard work train­ing for a marathon, learn­ing to speak a for­eign lan­guage, giv­ing birth, com­plet­ing a higher edu­ca­tion degree, and rais­ing kids. Ask any­one who has accom­plished one of these reward­ing endeav­ors if it was hard work, but also reward­ing. As the cliché goes, it was most likely a labor of love for those who have achieved one or many of these undertakings.

Do the work-regardless of the level of difficulty–and enjoy the pos­i­tive results.

It will be worth it.

by Kelly Sajo­nia

Kelly Sajo­nia is a writer for many sites, but spends most of her time writ­ing for her award-winning blog Naked Girl in a Dress. Her inspi­ra­tional blog cel­e­brates redis­cov­er­ing life and love at any age. Kelly also has a full ser­vice social media mar­ket­ing busi­ness, runs a social media site for writ­ers, teaches blog­ging, and occa­sion­ally takes a pro­fes­sional pho­tog­ra­phy gig.
Kelly Sajonia
View all posts by Kelly Sajo­nia

{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

Yum Yucky February 25, 2013 at 3:02 pm

I think about the first 4 years of my marriage and how difficult it was (and even beyond that). There’s so many who call it quits within 5 years or less. If they would just stick in there.. it’s sad to see people give up. I’m totally invested in my marriage. Giving up is not an option.
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Jen March 4, 2013 at 9:31 am

Love this article. Thanks for a valuable reminder that anything worthwhile is worth fighting for.
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bonooobong March 6, 2013 at 10:38 am

Hi Kelly, I totally admit it, it is really inspirational and motivational if you and your partner work on the same thing. It is some kind of competition, but the whole process is very very constructive and it increases the efficiency of the teamwork (in a good relationship of course). I speak about my own experiences, I am an architect/designer and my wife is an interior architect; we often work on the same project when it is about complex design. And I always enjoy to work with her, just like at the university when we had been students…
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