@Evita — Hi Evita. Not a romantic Valentine’s weekend — yes, you’re right!! And that you do not live life like most people — Evita — that’s really what I love about you. You are uniquely “you”, and in a way that just seems true to your core. I hope that I came across as calm and under control in this whole situation. And I love your point to that we can’t control others — how true! What others think — that’s one I could work on yet. Anyway, your words here today provide much comfort. Thank you, my friend…

@Bunny — Thanks Bunny. I’m glad it’s over. And we’re moving on. All in the tournament was a great success.

@Nathalie — This adversity was so sudden, and so unplanned. In a way, maybe that was good. I didn’t have a chance to let self-doubt creep in. Thanks so much for your very kind words. It’s always great to see you here Nathalie…

@Mike — Thanks Mike. It was one of those unfortunate situations where it just quickly got out of control. I’m just glad we were able to bring it back in control, and have the rest of the game go smoothly. Since then, we’ve had a lot of discussion on what is appropriate for refs, fans and coaches. If anything, it’s helped us (as a basketball program) see what we can do to help alleviate situations like this in the future.

@Patricia — Your words are very comforting Patricia, thank you for them. And…I’m working my way over to visit your Compassionate Communications posts — they do sound wonderful.

@Zandria — Hang in there Zandria. And for your friend, that is difficult when one bad thing happens after another. Being there for people in times like this can be all the difference in the world.

Zandria´s last blog post..Upskirting: A Privacy Violation That You May Never See Coming

Thank you too to Dot for the shout out about my Compassionate Communications — nonviolent communications posts I did over 4 posts. That is truly amazing stuff…in this case maybe to help settle the voice inside.

Very good post and sounds like a very good job. Thank you so much for sharing this experience and for volunteering for kids.

Patricia´s last blog post..Confessions of a Practicing Self Advocate

Mike King´s last blog post..8 Methods to Find Inspiration

I think you handled yourself well, and you’re really a great person for this type of responsibility.

Being put in a spot like that you have to not feel provoked speak wisely and calmly.

Great article on a unique matter.
Cheers

Bunny got Blog´s last blog post..The Forgotten Scientist: Nikola Tesla

So I take it that was the Valentine’s weekend you were talking about Okay, okay so not the most romantic of situations.…

Lance I have to say my thoughts are along those with Liara regarding these situations. I have changed my life so much simply in my thinking over the past few years, that today very little if anything “rattles” me in any sort of way. There is perfection and a time for learning in every moment. I know most people do not want to hear this — but that is just it, I really do not look at life or live life like most people.

And at the end of the day, and in the grand scheme of things, none of this really matters, what matters is who did you decide to be in the given situation — how you decided to express and experience yourself. As for others…well we know we will NEVER be able to make everyone happy or control their thoughts. But it is usually thinking about this “what the others will think or are thinking” that brings out in us our lowest moments.

But as you said…this too shall pass and that line alone is enough to give any situation a lot of perspective.

Evita´s last blog post..The Quote Effect E-Book — What Effect Will It Have On You?

Liara Covert´s last blog post..Retrace the dots & reprogram the mind

@Davina — Well, thank you Davina! It certainly wasn’t a “talk” I wanted to have — yet in the end, I think it worked out okay. Not perfectly by any means, and definitely rough while it was all going on. Still, maybe it’s time — but I’m pretty okay with it all now — and what is left to be discussed will be at our board meeting in March. And that should a better environment for this discussion to take place. And maybe that is part of it — all the positive comments here — it does really help!!

@Suddenly Slimmer — Hi Alia. “This too shall pass…” — that’s exactly what I told myself as it was all happening. And it is passing…days are brighter! Thanks much!

@Liara — Good point again, Liara. Did I have layers of misunderstanding? I’ll have to ponder this thought a bit…

@Patricia — Spiritual Journey of a Lightworker — Yes, I don’t think you could pay me enough to be a referee either! Interesting you mention the church league and them being the worst for arguing. I heard a similar remark from a couple of the referee’s we had for the tournament. Surprising… The “Let go, let God” is a very affirming statement (why didn’t I think of that when I was going through this!!). And, I am seeing lessons from all of this — from better planning we can do in the tournament, to how I might address a similar situation if faced with it in the future — and that’s the good in this…

@Brandi — As much as it felt personal during those moments — you’re right, it wasn’t. At least it wasn’t a personal attack on me. And that is a great lesson from this — that it doesn’t have to be personal — that I don’t have to take it personally. I tried not to. And maybe it helped that one mother came up and apologized afterward — and really indicated that her frustration was not with me, but what happened during the game. Anyway — personal it was not…and I’m working on remembering that!

but I love the story you shared because it showed how NOT personal the muck is. It’s still muck but it has nothing to do with YOU.

I love this story. LOVE. Have I said that enough?

thank you.

brandi´s last blog post..so why the joy rebel thing?

A children’s basketball game can quickly get out of hand. It is rarely because of the children. It is usually parents who don’t even try to control their anger. You could not pay me enough to be a referee.

My husband was an Athletic Coordinator for several different cities during his early career in Recreation before he discovered that he prefered to be self-employed. He said that the church leagues, whether it was basketball or baseball, were always the worst for arguing with the decisions of the referees. He would get many calls at midnight asking him to settle a disagreement between the teams that played that night.

In my own life, I have learned to look for the lessons that come with each challenge. This is beginning to happen when I find myself in the middle of the situation rather than after it is over. This is progress.

I often ask myself, “What do I need to learn from this?” Usually it has to do with my fears or I am resisting some change in my life. It sometimes comes back to “Let Go and Let God.”, an Al-Anon slogan that helps me to realize that I need to stop trying to control everything, AGAIN. Being a control freak, or I should say stopping being a control freak has been my biggest struggle since I became aware that I was doing it.

Patricia — Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworker´s last blog post..Kindness—Why Is It Easier To Be Kind To Strangers?

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suddenly slimmer´s last blog post..This Is Me..Outside Gym Life and Teaching Life

Maybe you attracted this. Maybe you didn’t — we’ll never know. But I can say that you were probably the best man for the job! They couldn’t have ask for a better messenger. Sorry you had to endure the fury though. When I’m on the ball, and this happens I remind myself that it’s not about me. And, look at how many supportive comments you’ve received here. I bet they outnumber the crowd at that game

Davina´s last blog post..A Dangerous Metaphor

How do I deal with stressful situations? When burdened with tension, I simply love going out for runs. But if it’s a situation that requires direct confrontation, I usually go with what seems best for everyone at the moment, though a better option always seems to pop up at a later time.

deepikaur´s last blog post..My Pandora Replacement [Music]