The Reward of Being Vulnerable

by Kelly Sajonia on · 9 comments

Would you like to go out some time?”

I’m crazy about you.”

I love you.”

Will you marry me?”

Let’s work at this; I don’t want to lose you.”

Each of these relationship-based state­ments has one thing in com­mon: plac­ing one­self in a vul­ner­a­ble posi­tion. The poten­tial for pain and rejec­tion exists when tak­ing a risk to share feel­ings and desires in a lov­ing rela­tion­ship. Some choose to not take the risk, sav­ing them from the pos­si­bil­ity of being hurt.

The down­side of evad­ing expo­sure to rejec­tion is far greater though; it means avoid­ing the poten­tial for great joy as well. Whether it is tak­ing a chance by ask­ing some­one for a date or being vul­ner­a­ble with a part­ner in a rela­tion­ship that needs repair, some level of risk is required to move towards a greater level of happiness.

To those who are risk adverse in relationships:

  • Take a chance.
  • Be vul­ner­a­ble.
  • Enjoy the reward of happiness.

“To be alive is to be vulnerable.”

~Madeleine L’Engle

by Kelly Sajo­nia

Kelly Sajo­nia is a writer for many sites, but spends most of her time writ­ing for her award-winning blog Naked Girl in a Dress. Her inspi­ra­tional blog cel­e­brates redis­cov­er­ing life and love at any age. Kelly also has a full ser­vice social media mar­ket­ing busi­ness, runs a social media site for writ­ers, teaches blog­ging, and occa­sion­ally takes a pro­fes­sional pho­tog­ra­phy gig.
Kelly Sajonia
View all posts by Kelly Sajo­nia

{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }

Bruce Sallan (@BruceSallan) June 25, 2012 at 2:19 pm

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marquita herald June 25, 2012 at 3:29 pm

Hum … okay I must confess up front that I have (relationship) commitment issues – but that stems from being married for many years and then divorced so trust me when I say nothing will change that. On the other hand, I enthusiastically agree about the value finding the courage to put ourselves out into the world to experience as much as life has to offer!
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Kelly Sajonia June 29, 2012 at 10:43 am

Thanks for your comment Marquita. It can be difficult to overcome commitment issues–something I readily admit I still battle. I have had so many wonderful experiences from being brave and allowing myself to be vulnerable so I will continue to do it–regardless of the difficulty.
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Jody - Fit at 54 June 26, 2012 at 2:59 pm

Yes, this is true & always working on it! :-)
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Kelly Sajonia June 29, 2012 at 10:44 am

It is something to be ever-mindful of, but worth the risk
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David Stevens June 26, 2012 at 7:13 pm

Hi Kelly,
Direct, to the point and makes a heap of sense. Thankyou
be good to yourself
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Kelly Sajonia June 29, 2012 at 10:45 am

Thank you for the kind words David!

“Be good to yourself.” What a wonderful comment and reminder. Something I try to focus on daily.
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rob white June 27, 2012 at 8:21 am

Well said Kelly. The fear of rejection is the basic, primal fear that dampens our confidence and destroys our initiative. Our survival instincts tell us to be safe and never risk vulnerability. Yet, how are we to experience our superlatively creative nature if we never leave our comfort zone? Allowing ourselves to feel vulnerable is a fabulous positive step toward fulfilling on our dreams.
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Kelly Sajonia June 29, 2012 at 10:47 am

If left unchecked, the fear you mention can be paralyzing. Life can be a wonderful experience by taking those risks.

Thanks for the comment!
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