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Hi Kara — Hopefully the book will be helpful to you or perhaps someone you know. Thank you.
.-= Betsy Wuebker´s Last Fabulous Post ..Roaming Through Michigan =-.

I think of a lot of scenarios in life come down to how you see the chessboard.
.-= J.D. Meier´s Last Fabulous Post ..Sites I Follow for Insight and Inspiration =-.

Thanks for sharing this information. Though I don’t want to admit it…I have found myself in my share of toxic relationships in my life. But now that I can see a lot of my choices in retrospect, I will not settle for this anymore. I still remember a boss that I worked for on a freelance basis…she once told me that she thought she paid me too much…how’s that for motivation? I will withhold the amount that I was getting paid because its really low. Betsy thanks for sharing your important info for us and Lance, thanks for giving Betsy a great forum.

Enabling is a tricky thing, isn’t it Jannie? And realizing how much it works against everyone involved can be like a V-8 commercial where the guy whacks his head in a sudden realization. I’m so glad our book could help!

I have hope, Barbara, that I can eventually build a total immunity. But you are right about their smooth operator ways. Thank you for your encouraging support!

Nadia, as Betsy writes, gauging normal in such toxic extremes is tough. I thought my relationship was normal, too. Our goal is to help others cut short the “years to figure it out” that we went through, too, and we are happy to share it!
.-= Lori Hoeck´s Last Fabulous Post ..Is your inner worth at the heart of your power? =-.

Congratulations on the creation of your e-book!

I have had my share of toxic relationships and it took me years to figure out what was happening because I thought such behavior was normal. Many of my past experiences were with people who were more toxic than a toxic dump and it took a lot of work to distance myself from them. However, I was able to do it. Woo hoo!

It is wonderful that you two are taking the wisdom that you gathered from such experiences and sharing it with others.

I have downloaded the book and look forward to reading it. Thank you for sharing it with all of us.
.-= Nadia — Happy Lotus´s Last Fabulous Post ..“Here Comes the Sun” – The Re-Invention Begins =-.

Hi Barbara — It’s interesting how you describe the narcissists you’ve known as “smooth,” and always knowing how to say the right thing to manipulate. Many also use drama and intensity in a similar way. I can remember saying about one narcissist, “It’s been too calm. Expect an invented crisis of some sort!” Once you’re beginning to catch on, it’s amazing how your awareness can build quickly, and their tactics can seem so transparent.

Like you mention, we’re getting additional feedback concerning referrals to others and that our readers are sending it on. That’s a great feeling. Thanks go to you for your support of this project!
.-= Betsy Wuebker´s Last Fabulous Post ..Roaming Through Michigan =-.

What can I say. The book you’re sharing is awesome and something I think everyone should read as I don’t think anyone is immune from dealing with a narcissist. When I think back to the ones I’ve had in my life I remember how “smooth” they were. So cunning and always saying the “right” thing. It wasn’t until later I realized it was a ploy to get me and/or others to play into their hand.

Fortunately that was in the past, but I must say, I wish I had “The Narcissist” at my disposal then. It makes for a terrific hand book and is one well worth passing on.

Betsy and Lori, you ROCK!
.-= Barbara Swafford´s Last Fabulous Post ..Sharing For The Benefit of Others =-.

Thank you both again. And thanks to you, Lance for spreading the word.

The track I took to dealing with a narcissist had to come first through an expanded awareness as Karl notes and then “tuning in” as Davina writes. Before those moments of awakening, I had tried so hard to fit a mold of someone else’s making — a mold that kept me in constant self-doubt. Evita is right, we need to take care of ourselves, but not in a way that turns us vain, cocky, or simply angry.

Objectivity and detaching as Eduard notes — once we are aware of the unhealthy dynamic — is crucial. I had to be the one to change, because a narcissist won’t, at least not for long. Like Yum Yucky says, a defense is needed. I like suzen’s take on them as “sticky wickets.” (I’m not sure what a sticky wicket is, but it sounds right!)

Megan, I’m blessed to have Betsy as a co-author. If you think her book overviews are good, you can imagine how much fun it is to co-author with her! She is can make things so succinct, as she did today with this: “Quantifying really isn’t the issue. It doesn’t matter how many trucks are on the road if one hits you, right?”

As for an epidemic of narcissistic thinking, Tess, I have seen the “I know better than you” attitude on the rise. Anytime someone decides they should always think for you, edit your options, or tell you how to better live your life, watch out! A consistent pattern of this kind of parental relationship when you are an adult can eat at your self worth.
.-= Lori Hoeck´s Last Fabulous Post ..Is your inner worth at the heart of your power? =-.