You Can Dazzle When You Are Vulnerable!

by Jen Slayden on · 16 comments

Today, while running errands in town I decided to save some time by visiting a car wash close by that was named "Dazzle." Since I was way on the other side of town that I do not visit often, I had not patronized the place before, and assumed it was just one of the speedy drive-through automatic washes.

Soon, though, a crew of guys were ready to welcome me into the tunnel, sprayers and washcloths in hand. One employee grinned at me as I tried desperately to help by steering my car into the garage and then putting on the brakes. Apparently this is not how Dazzle works. He turned his wet hand, mist around him in the cool breeze, and pointed to a bold sign decorating the entrance to the wash:

WARNING:

Put your car in neutral.

Do NOT brake.

Hands off the steering wheel!

I let go. I let the young men do their tasks, closely watching my mind and thoughts as I struggled to feel okay with being guided through the tunnel. I recognized how hard that was to just be vulnerable not only locked in my car, but emotionally vulnerable too.

Life, it seems, puts us out on a limb sometimes (or in a tunnel), to remind us that we are NOT always in control. I have encountered this numerous times in my life, but two mainly stand out: when I was giving birth to my three children, and when I just recently was bedside of a dear family friend during his passing.

Childbirth to me was the epitome of being at the mercy of whatever God, the doctor, or my body had in store for me. Each birth echoed similar fears and unknowns, even though each experience was unique. But when I made the choice to let go, to be emotionally open, the joy that was let in and the support that I felt from those around me was uplifting!

On the other end of life, last week I sat next to a dear family friend. The entire family sat at bedside as he struggled three days to release his body. Pastors came in, encouraging family members to not let things go unsaid, to say goodbye. In a sense….. to be vulnerable. Being emotionally vulnerable allowed for the family and all of us friends to be broken open, and to let others help us embrace our grief and sorrow and give comfort.

Vulnerability gets a bad name in our society. Yet, I have noticed in my own experience that it is the times in my life that I am vulnerable that result in the greatest joy, peace, love and harmony. After all, being VUNERABLE gives all of us the ABILITY to Dazzle. So go ahead, let go of that steering wheel every once in a while. You just may be surprised where your life will take you.

In Harmony,

Jen


by Jen Slayden

Jen Slayden finds her harmony in Western Montana with her husband Mark, their three kids, and an outdoor loving black lab named Cody. Stop by and check out her life in music, words, and education at Find Your Harmony.
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{ 16 comments… read them below or add one }

rob white June 4, 2012 at 8:21 am

I love the scope of your examples, Jen. One great asset of feeling vulnerable is that it alerts us to reality, and makes us more aware. Like you, Jen, I choose to look at reality rather than bury my head like an ostrich. When I retreat from life, I become ignorant. I ignore all of the beautiful insights and life-lessons that life is offering me.

All great achievers transform the feeling of vulnerability into eager anticipation – what an incredible feeling of freedom this brings with it!
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Find Your Harmony June 6, 2012 at 9:38 am

Love what you say Rob, especially the transformation of vulnerability to eager anticipation….wonderful!
THanks, as always, for you amazing insight, and for being here!
In Harmony,
Jen
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Glori June 4, 2012 at 9:43 am

This post speaks volumes. Vulnerability is something most cultures undervalue. But few fail to understand that vulnerability does not necessarily mean weakness. In fact, it take great strength and a huge amount courage to show your vulnerable side.
Thank you for the great post!
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Dan Black June 5, 2012 at 1:55 am

Great point Glori. It’s totally true about it taking “strength” and “courage” to be vulnerable. The best people and leaders I know understand this important topic.
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Find Your Harmony June 6, 2012 at 9:40 am

Thank you Gloria! You are absolutely right. And I think if we all choose to be more transparent as a society we will grow leaps in bounds in love, forgiveness, and compassion.
Love having you in the discussion!
In Harmony,
Jen
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Dan Black June 5, 2012 at 1:45 am

What a great reminder on the important and need of being vulnerable. I think it’s important to have trusted people who we can be vulnerable with and who knows our true self. Great story and post.
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Find Your Harmony June 6, 2012 at 9:41 am

That is so true, Dan. It is important to feel safe when you are feeling vulnerable. On the other hand, when we show vulnerability and see peoples response, it can be a measure of who really is our true friends….the ones that accept and support us fully.
Thank you so much for being here, Dan!
In Harmony,
Jen
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Dan Black June 6, 2012 at 1:46 pm

Your welcome. Great point about seeing others response.
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Hanna June 5, 2012 at 11:37 am

A beautiful post! Your relative has to feel lucky because he had the chance to say farewell to the people who he used to love. I wish my last day would be like that.

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Find Your Harmony June 6, 2012 at 9:42 am

Me too, Hanna! I think it is a blessing when there is a CHANCE to say goodbye. Sometimes people don’t get that chance, which serves as a valuable reminder to tell your friends and family how much you love and appreciate them every day!
In Harmony,
Jen
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Jennifer June 5, 2012 at 4:07 pm

Nice post. I think it’s impor­tant to have trusted peo­ple who we can be vul­ner­a­ble with and who knows our true self. Great story and post.

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Find Your Harmony June 6, 2012 at 9:43 am

Thank you Jennifer!
In Harmony,
Jen
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David Stevens June 5, 2012 at 8:20 pm

Hi Jen,
Thanks for your story here…I think with the car wash thing instead of being vulnerable you have opted for ‘trust’…and there are many times when we have to trust.
be good to yourself
David
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Find Your Harmony June 6, 2012 at 9:45 am

Ha, so very true David! Perhaps a bit of both? At any rate, I have decided I like to wash my car myself:) What does that say about me and trust?
Actually, it’s just much cheaper.
IN Harmony,
Jen
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Anna June 6, 2012 at 8:35 am

Being vulnerable doesn’t mean your coward or insecure. It means being more understanding to the things being perceived and taking time to think what is the right thing or step to do.
Thanks for this wonderful post!

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Find Your Harmony June 6, 2012 at 9:46 am

I agree Anna. Thank you for that! Sometimes it is a way to slow down and be mindful.
Hope you have a harmonious day!
IN Harmony,
Jen
Find Your Harmony´s Last Fabulous Post ..BILLY GOAT GRUFF?My Profile

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